


Then I Go And Spoil It All

by Wle0416



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Alex is grumpy but he gets better, Alternate Universe, Angst, Boys Kissing, Boys Talking, Drinking, First Meetings, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Jesse Manes is His Own Warning, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, Miscommunication, POV Alex Manes, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-02
Updated: 2021-01-29
Packaged: 2021-03-12 13:08:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 31,287
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28510941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wle0416/pseuds/Wle0416
Summary: Alex inherits an inn and travels to Roswell a few weeks before Christmas to sell it. While in town, he meets the inn's manager and the sparks start to fly.
Relationships: Michael Guerin/Alex Manes
Comments: 301
Kudos: 159





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys! I've been working on this forever off and on, and it's gotten to a point where I either need to post it or just abandon it forever. I've decided to just post it and put it out into the universe since it's consumed a lot of my time. 
> 
> It started off as Hallmark type of story, but it dovetailed a little more R rated than PG-13. And Alex has a boyfriend (for a time at least, wink wink) but you're not subjected to a ton of that relationship if new original characters aren't your thing. This is very much a Malex-centric story from Alex's POV and things move fast because this is Hallmark land. 
> 
> In this universe, Jesse is still horrible but he and Alex have no relationship, and Michael is still an alien. I also have negative idea what happens when you inherit a property, but I did watch a Lifetime movie with a similar set-up and used that to guide me, so basically I'm sure everything related to the inn is correct 🥴
> 
> I'm bad at tagging but I will do my best as the chapters come in. And I'm halfway through the second to last chapter as of the first post date, so I'll be updating regularly and I won't leave you hanging. Even if only 2 of you stick around to see this thing through 🙃

"Roswell, New Mexico? As in -"

Chuck was cut off by his boyfriend's laugh, coming from across the bedroom. "Yes. That Roswell."

"How have we been together for over a year, and you're just now telling me that you're from one of the most infamous towns in America?"

Alex continued packing the suitcase he had laid across his king-sized bed, his back to Chuck, who was lounging leisurely in the doorway. "I don't know. It never came up."

Chuck entered the room and plopped down on the bed next to the suitcase, eliciting an eye roll from Alex. "You always said you were from New Mexico and left it at that. You neglected to mention your hometown is famous!"

"That's because it's not my hometown. Not really. We moved when I was like seven. I barely remember anything," Alex said, as he folded up his favorite Air Force hoodie and placed it neatly on top of the rest of his shirts. Packing for an indefinite amount of time was always tricky, though Alex was increasingly hopeful he'd be in and out of Roswell within a week.

"It's just crazy I didn't know," Chuck stated with a shrug. He reached for Alex's hand just as he was about to close the suitcase and pulled him forward. It was awkward, as the front of the suitcase started to dig into Alex's hip, but he went with it. His lips brushed past Chuck's, and he could feel where things were headed.

"Hey, I need to finish packing. Not right now, okay?" Alex tried to say it as sweetly as possible, but he could tell by the look on Chuck's face that he was frustrated. These days they didn't cuddle much or even kiss for that matter. And sex? Who even remembered what that was.

Chuck released Alex's hand and lifted himself off the bed with a loud huff. He left the bedroom without saying a word, and Alex considered going after him but decided to give him some space.

Chuck and Alex, or Chex as their friends affectionately call them, had the kind of relationship that people envy from the outside. They were both beautiful, Chuck in the more traditional sense, with tousled blonde hair, big green eyes, and a body Alex swore was sculpted by Hercules himself. Alex was more disarmingly handsome, with his dark hair, olive skin, and deep brown eyes. They looked like a GAP ad come to life when they were together, and Chuck loved the attention they got when out and about.

Their relationship moved at a frantic, New York pace. And within six months of meeting, Chuck had ditched his three roommates in Brooklyn and taken up residence in Alex's Upper East Side paradise of a condo. And it was fun, and light and all the things Alex thought he wanted. But as time drew on, Alex could feel himself slipping further and further away from Chuck and the relationship.

Chuck had a kind soul. He was thoughtful and the first guy Alex ever felt comfortable with seeing him change his prosthesis. He'd even let Chuck help him take it off a few times and massage his stump.

Chuck was great. And things had been good for a while, and they were still good in some ways, but Alex had begun to wonder if Chuck was really "the one." At 29, he's been thinking more about what that means to him, realizing that it's something he longs for. He longs for a relationship that makes him giddy and a little bit scared. As corny as it sounds, he wants to find that person that makes him better and completes him in ways he didn't even know were incomplete. 

Alex loved Chuck in many ways. But was he the man Alex was destined to spend the rest of his life with?

Alex wasn't convinced.

Since they'd met at a farmers market nearly 15 months ago, they'd only spent a few days apart, so Alex knew his upcoming departure was weighing on Chuck. Though the circumstances were less than ideal, Alex was excited to get away from the city for a bit, but Chuck's co-dependency issues were becoming abundantly clear over the last few days.

"Hey." Alex finally left the comfort of his bedroom to join Chuck on the couch in the family room. "My flights pretty early tomorrow, and I'd like to get some sleep, but do you want to go grab a quick bite?"

Chuck ran a hand through his hair and took his eyes off the cooking show he'd been absentmindedly watching. "Can we go to that Korean place you like?"

Alex smiled warmly. "Like I would say no to that."

***

Later, as he laid in bed after a short makeout session, Alex randomly started to think about the man who called him three days ago to tell him he had to come to Roswell. There was something intriguing about the man, which was odd considering they only spoke for a few moments and their conversation was nothing spectacular. 

_"Alex Manes?" The voice was deep._

_"Yes. Who's speaking?"_

_"This is Michael Guerin. I'm the manager of the Starlight Inn Bed and Breakfast in Roswell."_

_Alex was beyond confused and frustrated with himself for not letting the call go to voicemail. "Okay. What can I help you with?"_

_"Um, I figured you'd be expecting my call."_

_"And why is that?"_

_"Your grandfather's lawyer said he'd faxed over the paperwork for the inn. And I was just following up to see if I could help in any way."_

_Alex was in his home office working, and he opened his home laptop to check his virtual faxes. A lawyer from Roswell had called him regarding his grandfather's will, and after playing a round of phone tag, Alex let the man know he could fax over any paperwork he needed to._

_That was last week, and Alex hadn't thought to even check for it because he'd assumed whatever was left for him wasn't anything of value. Of his three brothers and parents, Alex had talked to his grandfather the least over the years, so he wasn't expecting much, but his Pop Pop was always fair. So, he wasn't surprised to find out he'd left him something, no matter how small._

_Alex scanned through his faxes and finally saw a fax with a Roswell area code. He opened it, and as he began to read, his eyes almost popped out of his head._

_"What the fuck? He left me an inn?" Alex was talking to himself, forgetting he was still on the phone with Michael._

_Michael laughed. "Yeah, he did."_

_"I don't…what am I supposed to do with an inn?"_

_"Well, I guess you'll have to figure that out when you get here."_

_Alex was so wrapped up in his head that he almost didn't hear Michael anymore. "When I do what? Are you suggesting I come to Roswell? Christmas is in like three weeks!"_

_Michael laughed again, and Alex couldn't help but think how sensual it sounded. "Well, I was hoping you would, boss."_

_"Oh my god. Don't call me that." Alex sounded curt, and he knew that, but he was thrown for a loop. "I'm sorry. This is just a lot right now."_

_"Yeah, I can imagine. Well, how about when you catch your bearings, you give me a callback?"_

_"Uh, no, I'm okay now. I just, I didn't even know Pop-Pop, er, Hank had an inn." Alex imagined his grandfather briefly, remembering a kind older gentleman who was the exact opposite of his son._

_"Hank bought the inn about five years ago. It was a real fixer-upper, but Hank put a lot of effort and money into turning it around. It's a Roswell mainstay now." Michael spoke convincingly, and Alex could feel his passion through the phone._

_"How long have you worked there?"_

_"Been there for four years now," Michael began. "I'm also really sorry for your loss. Hank was a special guy. He took a chance on me, and I'll always be grateful for that."_

_Alex found it weird yet oddly comforting to hear a stranger talk about his grandfather in that way. Especially a grandfather he'd never gotten to know that well. "Thank you."_

_"So, do you think you'll be able to come out here at some point? I know it's close to Christmas."_

_"Yes. I will look up flights tonight."_

_"Great. This is my number, but I'm at the inn every day." Michael sounded pleased, and Alex smiled in turn for no good reason._

_"I'll be in touch, Michael."_

_"I look forward to meeting you, Alex."_

For such a rudimentary conversation, Alex sure had a lot of feelings about it as he closed his eyes that night. And he wasn't thinking about the inn.

***

Alex hated plane rides.

Being an army brat, he'd been on more planes than he cared to remember, plus those years overseas he tried very hard to suppress made it so he avoided air travel whenever possible.

Now he was dealing with his leg's stiffness and slight swelling after nearly seven hours on a flight and a two-hour layover in Chicago.

But driving into Roswell, he wasn't nearly as anxious as he thought he would be.

He downplayed Roswell's significance when discussing things with Chuck because that's how he was with him. He always kept him at arms-length, and that was something his therapist had mentioned on more than one occasion he was going to have to start talking about. Maybe he would one day, but he wasn't interested now.

Driving into Roswell in his rented Ford Taurus felt oddly cathartic for Alex, as he found himself enjoying being out of the city. It'd been years since he'd seen the desert and felt that dry air you only experience in the southwest.

Since moving to the city after his honorable discharge from the military, Alex settled in New York due to a job opportunity. He thought at first it would be a six-month job, but that soon turned into a year, and before he knew it, he had been in New York for four years and some change, with more money than he knew what to do with and a fantastic flat.

From the outside looking in, Alex had it all. But inside was a different story.

Alex pulled over to get some gas right as he reached Roswell's city limit and whipped out his phone to see a slew of messages from Chuck, his brother Greg, and Michael Guerin.

He bypassed his boyfriend and his brother to see what the hotel manager had to say first.

**_Michael (9:34 am): Hey boss! Safe travels on your flight!_ **

**_Michael (1:15 pm): We still on to meet at the inn around 3?_ **

Alex caught himself grinning at the screen like an idiot, and he had to reign himself in quickly.

Because he's him and he can't go into a situation blind, Alex looked Michael up on Instagram while he was waiting in the airport earlier that morning. And the way his stomach flipped when he caught sight of the handsome cowboy was far from normal.

Alex could appreciate a handsome man, but it was rare he was ever physically drawn to someone's photo. But he found himself scrolling through the man's profile page and becoming increasingly nervous about the prospect of being in the man's company.

**_Alex (2:00 pm): Headed to the hotel now. I'll see you there at 3._ **

He was getting ready to return one of Chuck's five phone calls when his phone chimed again. And this time, he looked right away instead of pocketing it.

**_Michael (2:01 pm):_ ** **_😉_ **

Alex let out a slight chuckle, wondering just who this Michael Guerin was sending him a winking face emoji when they'd never even properly met.

Chuck picked up on the second ring, and by the sound of his ragged breathing, Alex guessed he was in the middle of his at-home yoga workout.

"Sorry, I can call back," Alex said as he crept back onto the highway leading into Roswell.

"No, no!" Chuck almost yelled. "I can talk. How was your flight?

"You know, a flight."

Chuck sighed. "Okay, grumpy pants. Well, are you at the hotel yet? What are your plans for the day?"

Alex couldn't help but roll his eyes, as he and Chuck had gone over his itinerary ad nauseum the night before. "Not at the hotel yet. But I should be in about a half-hour. Then I'm going to get a shower and head to the inn. All things I told you about yesterday."

"Wow, you really are in a foul mood. Well, how about you just call me later after you're settled?" Chuck's voice was tinged with hurt, and Alex felt a lump forming in his chest.

Here was Chuck yet again, being sweet and just wanting to check in with his boyfriend, and Alex was cold for no good reason. He wasn't sure where this sudden surge of annoyance toward his boyfriend came from, though if he was honest with himself, it had been months since he was at least moderately happy in the same way he was when things first started with them.

Decisions and conversations would need to be had, but that didn't need to happen when Alex was on the other side of the country, right?

"I will call you later, okay? Enjoy your day." Alex waited for Chuck's grumbled reply and hung up.

Alex turned up the music and tried not to overthink things, but that's always much easier said than done.

Chuck was a great person who took Alex at face value and had never asked him to be anything other than what he was. And Alex was many things on any given day. He cared about Chuck, and they'd created a great life together, but there was a big part of him that wondered if he was settling for the easy path.

Their relationship was stable and fun, but shouldn't there be more than that?

This was Alex's first real relationship, so at times it felt like it was hard to trust what he was feeling. Maybe he was just scared and confused because every day with Chuck was mundane and rudimentary and not all-consuming and recklessly fun. But was that even real? Did people have relationships like that?

As Alex passed the sign welcoming him into Roswell, his thoughts drifted away from his life in New York City and toward his next few days in his hometown.

He suddenly found himself excited to put the east coast on the back burner so he could enjoy a few days in the desert.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex checks out both the inn and Michael Guerin.

Alex's hotel was a fifteen-minute drive from the inn, which sat just outside the center of downtown Roswell. It was only a few minutes' walk to various restaurants and shops, and Alex could see why the inn would be an attractive place to stay if you were visiting the small town.

The lawn was decorated with a slew of reindeer, and a large sleigh filled with presents sat right in the center of the small yard. The front porch housed a variety of white rocking chairs that went perfectly with the white and yellow exterior.

It looked much bigger in person than the pictures Alex saw online. You could tell it was an older establishment, but it looked to be in pretty decent shape, and the Christmas decorations gave it a very homey vibe.

Alex couldn't help but think how much work his grandfather must have put into the place because it was something special from the outside.

 _Holy shit,_ Alex thought to himself as the screen door flew open and Michael Guerin came walking out to greet him. He was wearing a skin-tight white t-shirt, even though it was barely 50 degrees and there was a strong wind in the air. His black jeans were also insanely tight, but they matched perfectly with the black cowboy hat placed upon his head. Alex could see some curls trying to peek out in the front, and he began to wonder if they were as soft as they looked.

"Alex Manes! Right on time!" Michael's voice was smooth, and Alex wished he wasn't cheesing as hard as he was at the cowboy standing in front of him, but he felt powerless to the way his lips curled up at the sight of the man.

"Yeah, I have a thing about being punctual," he said, still grinning his heart out. He extended his hands to Michael, who shook it with purpose, something Alex appreciated. Michael's touch sent a burst of energy through Alex's whole body, almost like a shiver, and he wondered if Michael felt it too, though his face gave nothing away.

"Did you find the place, okay?" Michael asked, pulling his hand away and taking his hat off. His curls flopped around freely, and Alex stared like it was a magic trick.

"Uh, yeah, yeah. Your directions were perfect. Though I probably could have used my GPS."

Michael's smile widened considerably, and Alex about lost all sense. "We rely way too much on technology these days."

Alex didn't know what to say to that, so he just nodded and stared back at Michael. They stayed staring at each other for a few seconds too long before Alex looked away first toward the house. "So, uh, want to show me around, manager?"

Michael's smirk and subsequent wink were threatening to break Alex apart, and it'd only been three minutes since he met the man. He tried to give himself an internal pep talk as he followed behind Michael into the inn, which was honestly breathtaking.

It was loud, with bold colors and intricate designs covering the foyer where a small desk sat next to a sweeping staircase. The first thing Alex noticed was the ceiling, as it was covered in an intricate mosaic of flowers. The walls were a mix of mustard yellows and oranges, with decorative artwork covering much of the space. It was a bit of a sensory overload but in the best possible way.

Alex must have been gawking because Michael's soft laughter utterly disarmed him.

"What?"

Michael smiled warmly. "Nothing. You just look like you're in awe."

"I mean, this place is incredible." And Alex meant it. He'd never seen anything quite like this.

"And you haven't even seen the rooms yet," Michael began, waving a hand for Alex to follow him into the dining area. "We're all booked up, but we've got a couple leaving later this week, and I can show you one of the bedrooms."

Alex nodded and took a look around the dining room, which continued the floral trend, with ivy outlining a huge bay window that overlooked a gorgeous patio, with the backdrop of the great, vast desert behind.

Again, Alex spent a long time just taking in his surroundings, running his fingers along the farmhouse dining table, and even picking up a stemless wine glass to inspect. He eventually looked up when he felt a pair of eyes laser-focused on the side of his face.

"Anyone ever tell you, you have a staring problem, Guerin?" Alex said it playfully, and Michael interpreted it that way. A huge grin overtaking his scruffy features.

"Eh, don't mind me. Just admiring the view."

_Is he flirting with me?_

Alex didn't have time to think or even react because in the blink of an eye, a beautiful girl came prancing into the dining space, and she made a beeline directly for Michael. She engulfed him in a hug, placing a massive kiss on his cheek.

Michael quickly turned his eyes back to Alex, and for a second, Alex thought his eyes were saying sorry, but he brushed it off and walked out of the room to give them some privacy.

 _Of course, he's straight. A guy like that is born with a girlfriend_ , Alex thought as he made his way back into the foyer area. A small table with several brochures spread across it caught his eye, and he picked up one that said 'Welcome to New Mexico' and began to flip through it idly.

"Hey!" A vibrant voice came from behind him. He turned around to see Michael and his lady friend staring at him.

"I'm sorry I didn't introduce myself. I'm Maria DeLuca," the stunning woman said, extending her hand to Alex. Her grasp was firm, and he could already tell that he was going to like her.

"Alex Manes."

Her face was warm and welcoming, and her brown skin shimmered against the sunlight that was slowly escaping the dining room. She was wearing a pair of patchwork jeans that looked like they came straight out of that Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants movie and a vibrant red blouse.

"I'm so sorry about Hank. He was such a special man," she said, her voice getting quiet.

Alex shrugged, a quip about not really knowing Hank on the tip of his tongue before thinking better of it. He expected to hear a lot of condolences while he was in town. "Thank you, Maria."

"I just stopped in on my way to work to steal Guerin for a quick bite to eat. Would you like to come with?"

"Actually, we kind of have some things to go over," Michael interjected. "I was going to take Alex down to Roger's office so he could meet with him about the paperwork."

Maria looked disappointed, and Alex had half a mind to tell him to get something to eat with his girlfriend so he could just take a nap, but when Michael walked past Maria to stand by Alex's side, he got the impression Michael wasn't in the mood for a lunch date.

At least not with Maria DeLuca.

"Okay then," Maria replied slowly, a bewildered expression on her face. She pulled it together and again walked up to Michael to kiss him, though this time it was a very brief one on his other cheek.

She reached out to grab Alex's arm sweetly. "It was nice to meet you. I own The Wild Pony, a locals bar on the outskirts of town. I would love to see you there while you're in town."

"Yeah, I'll stop in."

"Great. The first round is on me!" Maria exclaimed before she bounced right back out the door.

For as confident as Michael had been since the first time they spoke, he suddenly presented as uncomfortable, and Alex felt like he was missing something. But he'd just met these people, and he wasn't about to insert himself into any domestic situations.

Though, he'd be lying if he said he wasn't sufficiently intrigued.

"So, you want to take me to Roger's? Who's Roger?" Alex breached the silence, and it seemed to relax Michael a smidge.

"Roger was Hank's lawyer."

Alex felt like a stunod. He'd received a dozen emails from Roger and had even briefly talked to him on the phone. But Alex had a hard time remembering names, faces, and, well, everything.

For years his life had depended on it. Being able to recognize any and all threats and remembering the name and faces of people he'd only ever seen in a grainy photograph was essential. Mis-remembering or forgetting all together was never an option if he wanted to stay alive.

But in the subsequent years, he'd been out of the military and had transitioned into civilian life, one of the first things he'd learned in therapy was to be okay and comfortable with not remembering every single detail about everything he ever heard. And he may have taken that to heart a little too well because he found himself over the years forgetting people almost as soon as they walked away.

That's why in the back of his mind, he knew it was odd how much of an effect Michael was having on him. He could recall their one phone conversation in precise detail, and he was pretty sure he could remember every text and the exact facial expressions Michael was wearing during their first interactions a few minutes ago.

_What the hell was going on?_

"You want to follow me? Or I can take you in my truck?" Michael asked as the two walked back outside to the driveway.

"Um, I wouldn't mind being a passenger for a bit if that's okay."

Michael looked pleased and headed towards a pickup truck that had seen much better days. But Alex thought it fit with Michael's cowboy bravado.

"It's a quick ride, but I can show you some of the sights on the way back if you want?"

"Yeah, sure."

Michael wasn't lying. The ride was quick and painless, with Alex spending much of the ride looking out the window and trying to feel a sense of nostalgia regarding the place he spent the first few years of his life. But nothing came to him.

Roswell could have been any of the ten dozen small towns he'd visited or lived in during his lifetime.

Hartman and Sullivan's firm was right in the heart of Roswell, and Alex had to admit that the small town did have a lot of charm. He wouldn't mind taking a day just to explore the town and take in all the sights.

 _Maybe Michael will have a free day to show me around_ , he thought as Michael pulled the truck to a stop along the side of the curb near the office.

Once they made their way to the front door, they found a note attached to the door that said the office was closed for the next few days due to a family emergency.

"Oh, wow. I just talked to Roger the other day. I hope everything is okay," Michael replied, running his hands through his curly air. The wind happened to pick up at the exact moment Michael moved, and Alex's breath caught in his throat at the sight in front of him.

His ogling was broken up by the ringing of his cell phone in his pocket. He pulled it out and saw Chuck's name lighting up the screen. When he looked back at Michael, he saw his eyes flicker up immediately back toward the door, as he'd clearly been taking a little peek at Alex's screen.

Alex didn't want to answer the phone, so he didn't, choosing to put it back in his pocket after turning the ringer down.

"You can get that if you want," Michael offered up, looking a little guilty.

"No, it's okay. I can call him later," Alex replied. "Um, did you want to take me back to the inn?"

"Are you hungry? There's a diner just up the block," Michael motioned his hand forward, and Alex turned to see a neon sign with the name Crashdown Café a few blocks away.

Alex wasn't starving by any means, and he could have easily grabbed something to go and retreated to his hotel room. But the idea of spending more time with Michael Guerin was too enticing a request to pass up.

"Sounds good, Guerin."


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys have a lunch date & Alex makes a decision.

Michael explained in detail how revered the Crashdown Café was, and it took all of five minutes inside for Alex to see why. They dug into the alien motif, and they dug in hard. Alex had to smile at the old-school uniforms and antennas affixed to the waitress's heads because it was so cheesy yet so right.

They were seated in a booth near the front, and Michael was clearly a regular as he didn't even need to look at the menu when they sat down. And everyone they interacted with on their way to the booth greeted him by name.

"Mikey!" A gorgeous woman exclaimed, descending upon Michael with a loud kiss to his forehead. "It's been too long!"

Michael was not impressed with the nickname, and he gave her a stern look before he let his face break into a smile. "Hi, Liz. I've been busy at the inn."

A realization seemed to hit the woman, and she finally noticed that Michael wasn't alone. "Of course. Forgive me! Hello Mikey's friend, I am Liz Ortecho." She extended her hand to Alex, and he took it gladly.

"Alex Manes. It's very nice to meet you."

"Manes? Are you Hank's grandson?"

"I am yes."

Her face twisted into a frown, and Alex could see genuine concern in her eyes. Alex had just met this woman, and much like Maria, he knew he would like her. He started to wonder if everyone in Roswell was special.

"I am so sorry for your loss. Hank was a wonderful man."

Alex looked away. "Thank you for that. And that's what I hear. We weren't particularly close, unfortunately."

Liz took that answer and looked like she wanted to say more, but the alarm on her phone started ringing wildly. "I have to get to the lab. But it was nice to meet you, Alex. I hope we get to see each other again while you're in town."

Liz was gone as quickly as she came, and Michael laughed a little watching her leave in a flurry. "She's a hurricane."

"She seems sweet."

"Oh, Liz is the greatest. She's engaged to my brother, Max. And her dad owns this place."

Alex scanned the menu, already knowing he wanted a milkshake and anything fried. "So, did you grow up here?"

Michael leaned back in the booth, his chest expanding a bit. Alex could get used to that view. "I got here when I was fourteen. I was in foster care for years. I jumped around and eventually landed here."

"You said you have a brother. Were you guys in the system together?"

"Something like that."

The conversation stopped when the waitress came over to get their orders. Michael let out a full belly laugh when Alex ordered a milkshake, onion rings, French fries, and a cheeseburger.

"I'm sorry, didn't know my appetite was so amusing, Mikey!"

The laughter slowly died as Michael shot daggers across the table at Alex, who had the smuggest expression he could muster on his face.

"So, you've got jokes, Manes? And here I thought you were going to be some broody city kid."

"Don't forget, I was born here."

Michael's face continued to give nothing away as he dragged his pupils up and down Alex's face. Alex could feel his cheeks blushing, and he was happy when his phone vibrated loudly on the table, forcing him to look away from the cowboy.

Of course, Chuck was texting, and for as happy as he was for the distraction, he still didn't want to talk to him yet.

"You should probably talk to whoever it is that keeps contacting you," Michael offered.

Alex knew Michael didn't mean anything by it, but it still irked him that he was even giving an opinion on who he should and shouldn't be talking to. "Who I talk to and when probably isn't any of your business."

A cold blast seemed to descend upon the table in an instance, and Alex could see Michael literally shrink in on himself, his face a mixture of shame and embarrassment.

"Sorry, dude," he said in a hushed tone.

It wasn't like Alex to feel bad. He was a man who said what he said and meant what he said. Living a life as he did, he didn't have time to coddle people. But there was something in the dejected look on Michael's face that broke something inside Alex that he didn't even know could break.

"I have a, uh, I have a boyfriend," Alex said, sighing. "That's who keeps calling me."

Michael's face dropped a little, but he managed to smile through it. "Hey, you're right. Your business is your business. And I will mind mine from now on."

"It's okay, Michael," he laughed. "I don't know if you can tell or not, but I'm not exactly a people person."

"You're doing just fine with me."

That coldness that had ambushed the table started to dissipate in an instance with the sudden heat that covered Alex, as he sat on the receiving end of Michael's gaze. They were quickly interrupted by their food's arrival, and they settled into comfortable conversation while they ate.

Alex learned that Michael was a certified genius and had a degree in Business, and had longed for many years to see more of the world. But his family was in Roswell, and the inn had given him stability that he never knew he was missing.

For his part, Alex kept things much closer to his chest. It was easy to talk to Michael, and he loved listening to him drawl on, but it wasn't easy for Alex to just talk about himself. It didn't come naturally to him, so he avoided it.

"I feel like I've talked your ear off for the past hour!" Michael chuckled as they finally left the diner after an exceptionally long impromptu lunch.

"No, you didn't. You lead an exciting life, Guerin. And you should be proud of everything you've accomplished," Alex said as he gingerly got into the Chevy. His leg was acting up a bit, and he knew that the smart thing to do would be to go back to the hotel and take a nice bath. But he also didn't want the afternoon with Michael to end.

"You flatter me, honestly. But next time, I'm putting you on the hot seat," Michael joked, settling into the driver's seat and starting up the truck.

They got back to the inn sometime later after Michael drove by all the Roswell haunts. At this point, the sun had set, Alex had traveled cross-country that same day, and his leg was on fire. He should head back to his hotel room and sleep for the foreseeable future, but damn it if he didn't just want to be in Michael's presence for as long as he could. That's if the other man was up for it.

"I'll see if I can get ahold of Roger's secretary Pam and see when he's expected back. I hope this doesn't screw up your plans," Michael remarked as they both exited the truck.

Alex stayed rooted to the side of the truck and watched as Michael made his way over to him, a curious look on his face. He was probably wondering why Alex was just standing in place.

Alex knew if he moved and started walking towards his car, he'd lose his resolve.

"Um, no, it's fine. I'm here for at least a week. A few days won't matter much," Alex replied. "Are you working tonight?"

"Technically, yes. I have to do some rounds around the hotel," Michael said absently, stuffing his hands in his jeans, visibly shaking.

Alex started to realize how dumb it was not only to try to spend more time with a man he'd just met but also to keep him standing outside in the cold to idly chit-chat. "Oh, okay. Well, um, I guess we'll be in touch then?"

Michael nodded, a friendly expression affixed to his face. "Sure. I'll be done around ten if you're up and want to grab a beer. You could stop by the Pony, Maria's bar. Cheap drinks and good company if you're interested."

Alex once again could feel himself beaming but couldn't stop himself if he tried. "Yeah, sure. Text me the address?"

"Will do. I'll see you in a bit," Michael flashed one more toothy grin before he raced up to the inn.

***

"You are alive?"

Alex rolled his eyes as he sat down on his hotel bed, massaging his stump. He had Chuck on speaker, and within thirty seconds of being on the phone, he was already over it.

"It's been a busy day."

Chuck scoffed. "I was hoping not to do this while you're across the country."

"Hoping not to do what?"

"Do you think I'm an idiot? You've been pulling further away from me for months now. And then you up and leave right before Christmas to go to some town you never even told me you were from, and you can't even answer your goddam phone! I feel like an idiot. What are we doing here, Alex?"

Alex heaved a heavy breath and collapsed back on the mattress. He knew he'd been a jerk lately, and it was uncalled for and beneath him to mistreat a wonderful guy like Chuck. Their relationship had been a bright spot for many months, but something changed in Alex when they moved in together.

After getting out of the military, he was used to his own space and reporting to himself. Then Chuck came along, swept him off his feet, and suddenly everything around him was changing, and he ignored the tiny voice in his head telling him it was too much for him to handle because he desperately wanted it to work.

He wanted to be happy. He still longed to be happy.

That's not to say Chuck made him unhappy, but there was something about their relationship that always felt just a little bit off. And instead of admitting that and talking it through, he pushed and pushed to the point that his boyfriend had to broach the conversation over the phone when they were thousands of miles apart.

"You deserve better than this, Chuck," Alex spat out. "You deserve better than me."

He heard Chuck gasp loudly. "What are you talking about? I love you. I deserve you."

Alex ran his hands through his hair, taking a few seconds to find the right words. "Chuck. I didn't want to have this conversation over the phone. But I've been avoiding it for a long time now, and here we are. I'm just, I'm sorry. The last thing I would ever want to do is hurt you when you've been so good to me. You are a good man, and you deserve someone who is all in and wants the same things you do. At one point, I thought I could be that guy, but I know now that I'm not."

"Do you not love me anymore?" Chuck's voice was soft, nearly broken, and it felt like a serrated knife twisting into his gut.

"It's not really about love. I care about you the same as I always have, but I just don't feel like this is working. I haven't been happy," Alex murmured the last part. He could hear Chuck's breathing stutter, and even though his words said one thing, all he wanted to do was give Chuck a reassuring hug.

This was bigger than just a simple breakup where they could walk away, and things would be done. They'd created a life together, and they still had obstacles to face. In a perfect world, Alex would love for them to walk away as friends, but he wasn't silly enough to put that out there right now.

"Hello?" Alex asked after an extended silence from Chuck.

"Yeah, I don't know what to say, Alex. You left this morning, and now you're breaking up with me. I'm in a little bit of shock right now."

"I know. I know. Listen, I'll be home in a few days, and we can talk, okay?"

"Is there someone else?"

The words settled uncomfortably on Alex's chest, and a vision of Michael Guerin's smile flashed across his eyes. He shook his head vehemently before speaking. "I'm not leaving you for someone else. It's not that salacious, Chuck."

"If I hadn't started this conversation, were you ever going to tell me any of this?" Chucks said through sniffles.

 _I don't know_ , Alex thought to himself but didn't dare say out loud. For as brave as his service record said he was, he felt very spineless when it came to admitting and trusting his feelings. "I never wanted to do this while we were in different states."

Chuck didn't speak for a whole minute as Alex stared at the screen. A text came through from Michael, but Alex couldn't bring himself to read it while Chuck was breaking down on the other line.

"Can we still talk while you're on your trip?" He finally stated.

"Sure. I'll call you tomorrow night, okay? And don't make any rash decisions or anything. I'm not telling you to move out tonight or anything like that."

"Yeah, okay. I'll talk to you tomorrow," Chuck said flatly. He hung up before Alex said goodbye.

Alex glanced at the clock and saw the time was a little after ten, and he assumed Michael had finally texted him the address to The Wild Pony. He knew he should probably bail on the drink and just sit in his room and mourn the end of his first long-term relationship, but the thought of sitting alone all night just didn't sit right with him.

He opened the message from Michael and saw that he had indeed sent him the directions along with a smiley face emoji.

**_Alex (10:07 pm): I'll be there soon_ **

**_Michael (10:08 pm): It's very casual FYI_ **

**_Alex (10:08 pm): Damn. I'll take my suit off then_ ** **_😜_ **

A wave of regret surged through Alex as soon as he sent it, and he hoped Michael would ignore his pathetic attempt at humor. But of course, he couldn't get that lucky. 

**_Michael (10:09 pm): Sucks for me. I would have liked to see that_ ** **_😁_ **

Alex's laugh filled up the quiet air.

He went about getting himself ready, still feeling a little queasy and like the biggest jerk in America for going out mere minutes after hurting someone's feelings.

But what was the harm in grabbing a beer with a new friend?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, Chuck. In Hallmark land, decisions have to be made quickly!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys grab a drink, and things get a little angsty.

Alex was on shot number three and beer number two when that sinking feeling in his chest finally started to dissolve. And his mind stopped flickering between fretting about what was going to happen when he went back to New York and watching Michael every time he retrieved drinks from the bar and spent an inordinate amount of time talking to Maria DeLuca.

His first impression of Maria was spot-on, and before he and Michael left the bar to grab a booth, he found himself entirely under Maria's spell. She was witty, intelligent, and had an inviting spirit you just wanted to surround you and pull you in close.

Michael and Maria had a banter that was more sibling-like than romantic, but there were moments when Maria's gaze would linger on Michael a little too long, and Michael's hand would cover Maria's when it really wasn't necessary.

Alex couldn't bring himself to straight up to ask if they were together, so he chose not to say anything at first. But he got his liquid courage half past midnight when Michael returned to the table with beer number four.

"So, how long you two been together?" Alex winced at the slight slur in his voice and vowed to concentrate harder on enunciating his words.

Michael looked confused. "Who?"

Alex nodded toward the bar. "You and Maria."

Michael took a long sip of his beer and narrowed his eyes. He and Alex had the same amount to drink, but he looked completely in control, while Alex knew the same couldn't be said for him. "We aren't together. At least not anymore."

There seemed to be a tiny bit of sadness in Michael's voice, and a sober Alex who respected boundaries would have changed the subject. But not this, Alex. "She dump you?"

"No, no," Michael replied. If he was caught off guard or offended, he didn't let on. "We went out for about a year. And we broke up about six months ago, but stayed good friends."

"You seem sad about it."

Michael shook his head. "Maria is great, but we didn't work. My heart wasn't always in it, and she should be with someone who is all in. I think sometimes I just get a little sad that I don't have anyone anymore. I love my life, but one day I would like to share it with someone."

Alex watched Michael sip his beer, eyes downcast and avoiding contact, and he desperately wanted to reach across the table and just touch him. He never felt such an intense attraction and connection to anyone this quickly. Not Chuck or any of the other guys he'd been with over the years. It was intoxicating and scary as hell, mainly because there was zero proof this man would even accept that kind of attention from another man.

Alex felt the vibes coming from Michael, they were hard to miss, but he still wasn't sure this was anything more than just an insanely charming man being charming. 

Plus, there was the whole issue of him being single for all of three hours.

"Yeah, I understand that feeling," Alex finally added. 

Michael sat up a little straighter. "I wasn't going to ask, but since you're asking me my business. I think it's only right you tell me a little bit of yours. Like what's up with you and Chuck?"

A wicked grin formed on Alex's lips. "How did you know his…? I knew you were looking at my phone."

"It was ringing all damn day! I couldn't help it."

Alex leaned on the table, his elbows thudding loud. "Chuck was my boyfriend."

"Was?"

"Was. We broke up a few hours ago."

Michael's eyes went wide, and he placed his beer down loudly. "I'm sorry, what? You broke up with him tonight?"

"Technically last night, but yeah. I didn't plan on it. Please don't think I travel across the country to break people's hearts. He just brought up how distant I've been the past few months, and I just couldn't lie anymore, ya know?"

Michael listened intently, nodding along, which caused his curls to bounce across his forehead. "Are you okay, though?"

"Yeah," Alex started, though he could feel himself getting a little choked up. He knew it was the alcohol causing his defenses to be so lowered that he would allow himself to share this much information, and this much emotion with a stranger. In public, no less.

It had to be the alcohol and nothing more.

"It's funny because it's kind of like what you said about Maria. Chuck was the perfect boyfriend. He put up with me, which is not easy, and he loved me for me. Not my military rank or my apartment, which is fucking amazing, by the way, but me. And I think I was happy in the beginning. Or, I'd at least convinced myself I was. But something was missing. I loved him, but I didn't _love_ him. So, now I'm sitting here in New Mexico across from a guy I barely know on the verge of tears because I realize that when I go back home, I'm going to be utterly alone again. And I might stay that way forever."

Alex wanted to look away from Michael, fearing the pity he'd see, but there was nothing in Michael's eyes that said he felt bad for Alex. No, his eyes shown concern and understanding only. And when Michael casually moved his body forward across the table and gave Alex's right hand a little squeeze, something warm inside Alex sprang to life and threatened to bloom out of his chest.

Michael pulled away after a few seconds; a bashful look settled upon his face. "I know we're strangers, but there's something about you that feels so familiar."

"I know the feeling," Alex replied before the shattering of glass nearby snapped both their heads away from each other.

Alex took a few seconds to collect himself, wiping his eyes clear of the unshed tears he'd managed to keep at bay. "I'm sorry, Michael. I didn't mean to come out and get all emo on you."

Michael waved him off. "Stop it. I'm glad I'm getting to know my boss better."

Alex groaned, which pulled a laugh out of Michael. "I still can't believe I have an inn."

"Have you started to think about what you want to do?" Michael asked innocently enough, but Alex could see he'd gotten a little antsy even in his current state of mind.

"I was hoping not to be drunk for this talk, but I don't know, Michael. I'm not moving to Roswell to operate an inn. And if the inn is as special as you say, I'm sure there will be a lot of buyers out there if I put it on the market-"

"Oh."

"I mean, what other choice do I have? I didn't exactly ask for this."

"Yeah, I guess you didn't. But are you really just going to put the inn on the market, take the highest bid and go? I know the inn means nothing to you, but it meant a lot to Hank." Michael said sharply, his voice a little too loud even for a rowdy cowboy bar. 

Alex began to feel overheated, but he did his best to ignore it. "Listen, I haven't made any decisions yet. We're getting really far ahead of ourselves right now."

Alex hoped his answer was sufficient enough, and he and Michael could get back to looking into each other's eyes. Maybe even a little more innocent touching.

But he could see that the softness of Michael's features were now shrouded in anger, and he knew their moment had passed them by.

"The inn is important to Roswell. And there are a lot of amazing people who work there. Who knows what new management does to all that!"

"Whoa, Michael. Let’s just relax here, okay. You don't need to be worried about your job right now when I haven't even done a single thing yet."

Michael took a long sip of his beer, Adam's apple bobbing in earnest, and slid out of the booth. "I'm not worried about my job, Alex. I'm worried about Carla and her daughter Mercedes, who have done housekeeping there for years. And Javier, the head chef, whose wife is sick. I could give a shit about me. It's all the people who make the inn what it is that I'm worried about."

Alex felt overwhelmed in the worst possible way. Like he was two seconds away from ugly crying or vomiting on his lap. "Why are you just assuming someone is going to buy the place and get rid of the staff? Isn't this a bit irrational?"

A tight smile crept on Michael's face, and damn, did Alex miss the hearty, genuine one that was there a few minutes ago. "Hank wanted the inn to stay within the family. He always said you were the best of the Manes and that you would do right by it. I guess we'll see if that's right, huh?"

And with that, Alex was left for the second time that evening without a meaningful goodbye.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Michael really cares about the inn, OKAY? And Alex is still a little prickly bean but their moment is coming!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex spends some time at the inn. And the boys make amends after a slight hiccup.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just an fyi as we're reaching the halfway point, I don't have a beta but I'm trying my best to catch the mistakes as I'm posting! Don't kill me if I miss something big lol

Alex awoke the next morning with a massive headache and a gut full of regret.

He shuffled around his cramped hotel room, downing Advil and copious amounts of water while getting himself ready for another day in Roswell. He knew he had to have two important conversations today, plus he planned to visit the local real estate agency.

No matter what complicated feelings he had accumulated over the past twenty-four-hours for a sexy cowboy, the fact remained that he was not staying in Roswell, New Mexico, to manage an inn. And he needed to get it sold as soon as possible so he could get back to his life in New York.

Except, that could be an even greater clusterfuck than the predicament he found himself in now.

He'd promised to talk to Chuck, but there was no way he could do that before he had a cup of coffee and some over-easy eggs.

So, he headed back to the Crashdown, as it was the only restaurant in town he knew, and he settled at the counter, hoping a little caffeine and sustenance would help him get rid of the last remnants of his hangover.

"Oh, hey! Alex, right?"

Alex turned away from the waiter who'd just taken his order and saw Liz plopping down on the empty stool next to him.

He pasted on the warmest smile he could despite how much it didn't suit his actual mood. "Yes. Hi, Liz. How are you?"

She was beaming and radiant like the last time he'd seen her, and it had Alex wondering if that was her baseline mood. "I'm doing well. I was just coming in to grab some coffee, and then I've got like a million shops to hit today. I am like the worst last-minute shopper. How are you?"

"Ah, yeah. I've almost forgotten that Christmas is soon," Alex began. "Um, I'm fine. Just grabbing something and then… I'm not really sure."

"Is Michael with you?"

Alex visibly winced but tried to cover it up with a cough. "No, no. He's not."

Liz didn't pick up on Alex's awkwardness and barreled on with her cheery attitude. "Can I just say, Mikey is a sourpuss like 100% of the time, and to actually see him smile multiple times yesterday when I saw you guys here was weird!"

"Really?" 

A man appeared out of nowhere with a coffee and a small paper bag that he placed on the counter for Liz. She nodded happily and grabbed the items before sliding off her stool. "Oh, yes. It's kind of a running joke that Mikey doesn't smile unless he's fixing something, talking about engineering, or-"

Alex was hanging on Liz's every word, and when she abruptly stopped talking, he swore his heart stopped as well.

"Let's just say, he doesn't smile often. He's been through a lot, and I truly love seeing him happy." Liz finished with a small smile. "I'll see you around, Alex!"

And then she was off, and Alex desperately wondered what she'd decided not to tell him about Michael. 

***

Alex meandered around town for a few hours after breakfast, hitting a deli, the UFO Emporium, and an old bookstore where he picked up an old copy of Slaughterhouse-Five to read since he expected to be spending more of his time in his hotel room and not with a devilishly handsome man.

He briefly met with Pamela Ross, Roswell's number one realtor, so said the sign around town, and she was shocked to learn that the inn was potentially going on the market. She passed Alex's information to a colleague of hers who dealt with sales of that magnitude, with a promise to get into contact with him tomorrow.

Just after he grabbed a soda and chips for dinner at a local gas station, Alex decided to swallow his pride and head over to the inn in hopes of running into Michael and having a conversation that didn't end in anger.

The inn was lit up beautifully when Alex arrived, the white lights shimmering brightly and the chimes blowing in the wind. Each time he saw it, he fell a little more in love with its beauty.

Alex didn't have many memories of his childhood that he liked to remember, but he did remember his grandfather's love of foliage and flowers. His home was surrounded by tall Sycamore trees that he and his brothers used to run around in the spring months when their Mom would let them visit for a few days over spring break. Alex didn't remember loving the visits or anything, but he always thought of his grandfather as kind. He wasn't ostracized or made to feel different when he was at Pop Pop's house, which was a completely foreign concept to him growing up.

Walking into the inn, the foyer was empty, but there were voices and smells radiating from the dining area. Alex hadn't been thinking about the fact that it was dinnertime, and he was about to turn on his heels when an older-women descended the staircase with a handful of linens and a wide smile.

"Oh, hello, sir. I apologize no one was there to greet you. It's dinner time, so everyone is a little bit preoccupied. But may I help you with something?" She was sweet and inviting, like everyone else he'd met so far.

"It's fine. Can I help with that?" He offered, as she finally reached the last stair and walked to him.

"Nonsense," she admonished. She side-stepped him and deposited the sheets in a large basket sitting behind the front desk area. "Easy peasy. Now, what can I do for you?"

"I'm Alex. Alex Manes. I was hoping to catch Michael. But everyone is busy, and I'm going to see myself out and try again later."

The lady was on top of him before he could brace himself, and they were both lucky she was so small and lithe that he was able to keep his balance. She was hugging him hard, and he couldn't in good conscience tell her to get off of him, so he accepted the hug and gave her a little squeeze back before she released him.

"I apologize, Mr. Manes. I just knew you looked familiar. You have Hank's smile. Boy, do I miss him," she said glumly, taking a step out of Alex's personal space. "I'm Carla. I've been here since the beginning."

The name registered quickly, as Alex spent much of his day replaying his argument with Michael on a loop. "Yes, Carla. It's so good to meet you."

"It's so good to meet you. Have you gotten the full tour? Are you hungry? Javier always makes extras for dinner to feed the staff. Let's go get you a plate," she started to walk toward the back of the establishment, and Alex wanted to stop her but stayed silent instead and followed along.

They passed the dining room on the way to the kitchen, and Alex saw it full of food and heard the booming laughter. When they reached the kitchen, a stocky man with a head full of gray hair was hovering over a pot of soup that may have emanated the greatest thing Alex had ever smelled.

"Javy! Guess who's here? Alex Manes!" Carla exclaimed.

Javier looked up from his pot and looked a little confused until recognition set in. "Sir! A pleasure! Please, come in, come in! It's a tiny space but make yourself at home. Would you like some green chile stew? I have plenty."

"You know what, that sounds great. And it's a pleasure to meet you as well."

Javier seemed delighted. He moved some dishes that had accumulated on the island in the center of the kitchen to set up a mock place setting for Alex, complete with a dishtowel as a placemat, an oversized spoon, and a paper coffee cup. He scooped out a generous amount of stew into a bowl and put it down on the dishtowel before grabbing a pitcher of iced tea from the fridge and pouring it into the coffee cup.

Alex was so mesmerized by watching Javier move around that he missed Carla sneaking out until she came back in with a small stool for him to sit on.

"Oh, I can stand it's no trouble. You sit, ma'am."

Carla gave him a little wink and motioned for him to sit. "I still have a few things to do. Please sit and enjoy your supper."

Once only the two men remained, Alex stayed pretty quiet as he ate his soup, and Javier busied himself with making mini crème brulees. The soup was fantastic, quite possibly one of the most flavorful things he could ever remember eating. And he'd finished the soup in a few minutes, surprising Javier.

"Hungry? Or is my cooking that good?" Javier joked as he began setting the desserts on a tray.

"Your cooking is that good," Alex said with a chuckle. "Honestly, that's the best meal I've had in a very long time, sir."

"Call me, Javy, please."

The kitchen's swinging door burst open, and Michael came in looking a little frazzled and like he was on a mission. He started speaking before he even noticed Alex was in the kitchen as well.

"Javy, dude, what's the holdup? I needed that dessert-like five minutes ago," he bellowed, hands on his hips. He was trying to look authoritative, but Alex could tell immediately that Michael could never make Javier feel bad.

"Sorry, Michael. I'm plating them right now."

"It's my fault," Alex spoke up from his stool. Michael's head whipped to the left, and he finally noticed Alex sitting there, and his eyes got wide. Alex wasn't sure if he was mad, annoyed, or pleased. His face seemed to be a mixture of all three.

"What are you doing here, Alex?"

Alex cleared his throat out of instinct, not because there was something stuck in there. "I came to talk to you. And I ran into Carla, who brought me here, and I asked Javier to try some of his soup. Please be mad at me for the dessert coming out late. I monopolized his time."

"The food is for paying customers," Michael said coldly.

Javier looked like he wanted to say something but decided against it and just gathered the tray he'd been working on and left the kitchen in a hurry.

"Look, Michael. Can we talk for a few minutes? Please." Alex stood up from the stool and tried to smile but was forced and unnatural, so he abandoned it quickly.

"You have five minutes, Manes," Michael said, leaving the kitchen. He didn't tell Alex to follow, but he did anyway, and Michael led him to a small office on the first floor. A large desk inside took up most of the room, with two small chairs across from it.

Michael failed to shut the door, nor did he sit at the desk or in one of the chairs, choosing to stand beside the desk instead. Alex sat down in one of the chairs to take the pressure off his leg, and he hoped Michael would sit beside him, but he stayed as still as a statue, seemingly waiting for Alex to start talking.

"I haven't made any decisions about what to do with the inn yet. But I'm not in the position to own an inn. For starters, I don't know the first thing about being an inn owner. And I don't live in New Mexico. It's just not feasible for me right now. But my intention is not to sell it to just anybody. And I'm certainly not looking to sell it to someone who's intention is to get rid of the staff. But I feel like you're not even trying to see things from my perspective here. I find out a grandfather I haven't seen or spoken to in god knows how long leaves me a property halfway across the United States, and I'm just supposed to have all the answers. Well, I don't have them, Michael. But I want to do right by everyone here. I do." Alex let out of long breath by the time he finished and saw that Michael's face was devoid of any discernible emotion.

He stayed silent for a few moments before he collapsed on the chair next to Alex finally and sighed loudly. "These people mean a lot to me. I don't have a family. Not in the traditional sense, at least. I have a brother and a sister, but we didn't grow up together. And that's it. When I met Hank, I lived out of my truck, spending whatever money I did make on booze. I'd done some work for him on his house, and he sought me out to help with some repairs around here. Within six months, we worked out an arrangement; he would make me the interim manager if I took night classes and got my bachelor's degree. In the beginning, we were barely staying afloat. And Hank and I did everything so much by ourselves because he couldn't afford to pay everyone full-time. But he always found time to help me study for tests. Some of my best memories were of us sitting in that dining room talking about life."

Alex felt a sudden surge of jealousy. Jealousy of Michael and this relationship he shared with his grandfather. Though, if he was honest, Alex shut the door on his own family a long time ago, so it wasn't Hank's fault they were never close as he got older.

"Anyways, I just get scared. Everything is changing, and I got so used to how things were," Michael continued. "I guess it's my fault for getting comfortable. I know better than that."

"I, uh, I cut off all contact with my family when I joined the Air Force. I had a shitty childhood, and I enlisted and just never looked back. Pop Pop was, he was a good man from what I remember. Everything you're saying adds up with the man I knew," Alex said forlornly, briefly wondering if his life would have been even remotely different if he hadn't shut Hank out along with everyone else.

"He said his son was a dick. I take it that's your Dad," Michael spoke gently, but the words still filled the air.

Alex shook his head up and down, an odd smile forming. "Yeah, that's him. He was a dick to everyone, but I was the gay kid. And that meant he saw me as the weak ones, so I got it the worst. My Mom left when I was about nine, and she was the one who took us out to visit Hank every year. My Dad never took us, but Hank would send cards on our birthdays and holidays. Call occasionally. I just, when I got away from my Dad, I couldn't go back. To any of it."

Once again, after a conversation with Michael, Alex was expecting pity from the man and soft-spoken 'I'm sorry.' That's what happened when he'd told Chuck some of this, and he hated how much the words stung him because he hated for people to pity him. You pity the weak. And Alex had a long service record that showed how strong he was.

"Hey, you did what you had to do to survive. And you did. Sounds pretty brave to me."

His attraction to Michael threatened to engulf him at that moment, and he had to physically stop himself from reaching out and touching Michael, whose arm was a mere five inches away.

They made eye contact, focused only on one another, the heat in Michael's eyes matching the fire Alex felt throughout his entire being. He felt compelled to keep talking, to tell Michael everything there was to know about him because he wanted Michael to see him. He'd never wanted anyone in his life to see every single piece, but he wanted that right now with Michael. He wanted to lay his soul bare, bring every bruise to light, and let Michael help him heal fully and completely in a way he'd never quite been able to do.

He felt so much in that moment, and he was dying to know what that gorgeous head was thinking. But they were interrupted by a knock on the door that startled them both.

"I'm sorry," Carla said, a little embarrassed. "I just need to steal Mr. Michael for a few minutes."

Alex stood up first and put his hands up. "You guys go ahead. I've taken up everyone's time. I should get going anyway."

Carla just stood in the doorway looking between the two, and Michael finally made to stand up and extend his hands to Alex. He stared at it for a beat too long before realizing he was meant to shake it, and when he did, the warmth that was already cascading through him perked up, and Alex practically ran out of the room shouting a goodbye over his shoulder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the start of my favorite chapters because I literally love nothing more than seeing the boys TALK and ALMOST TOUCH.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael takes Alex on a road trip, and THERE IS ONLY ONE BED.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been updating tags, but please let me know if there's anything you think I'm missing!

Alex's phone started vibrating the next morning around 7:30 am, and he was silently praying it wasn't going to be Chuck.

They'd spoken late last night after Alex had left the inn, and Chuck had been drinking, so the conversation was all over the place and not something Alex wanted to re-visit again. But knowing Chuck, when he sobered up, he'd want to talk it out and apologize for anything he said or did wrong.

But Alex had no desire to talk about Chuck's proposition that they have phone sex, even though they were twenty-four hours removed from a break-up.

Alex grabbed his phone off the nightstand and saw he had a few texts from Michael. The way his mood immediately brightened made him cringe a little inside.

_What is this guy doing to me?_

**_Michael (7:28 am): What are you up to today?_ **

**_Michael (7:29 am): Interested in a day out?_ **

**_Alex (7:31 am): I thought you had work every day?_ **

**_Michael (7:32 am): The inn won't fall apart if I take the day_ **

**_Michael (7:32 am): S0_ **

As giddy as Alex was, he stopped himself from replying HELL YES right away and thought about what he had on his agenda for that day. Outside of hoping to talk to the realtor, he didn't have anything else he had to do. Roger was still MIA, and until he signed the papers and the inn was legally his, there was only so much he could do with the realtor anyway.

**_Alex (7:35 am): What did you have in mind?_ **

**_Michael (7:37 am): You wanna go for a ride?_ **

***

Michael arrived at the hotel around 9 am with coffee and donuts.

They sat in the hotel parking lot, each getting a donut down and some sips of coffee before Michael started driving.

They drove for a good hour and a half away from Roswell, talking about everything from the weather to music, before Alex finally spoke up and asked where exactly Michael was taking them.

"Have you ever been to Albuquerque?" Michael asked with a little grin, eyes still firmly on the road.

"You're taking me to Albuquerque? What's in Albuquerque?"

"I just couldn't let you come to New Mexico for possibly the only time and just see Roswell," Michael said. "I spent a lot of time in Albuquerque before I settled in Roswell. It's not like there's a lot of great memories there for me or anything, but hey, maybe that will change today."

Alex felt that urge again to reach out and touch Michael, his hand resting on the bench between them. But he stopped himself. "Well, I can't wait to see it. Though I'm not sure it will compare to winter in New York City."

Michael laughed heartily, and Alex swore it was the best sound he'd heard in months. "Tell me about New York, city boy. I've never been."

Alex looked out the window at the never-ending desert and forced himself to think about the honking, the skyscrapers, and the general busy nature of the city that never sleeps. "It's a lot louder, that's for sure. Smoggy. And there are people everywhere, at all times of the day, no matter where you are. It was very overwhelming when I first got there. I lived all over when I was in the military. Did a few tours overseas but after-"

Alex stopped, as it hit him that the two of them hadn't discussed his leg. And a small, naïve piece of him once thought they never would. He was not ashamed in the way he was maybe a year ago, but it was still not something he shared with most people unless he had to. And he most certainly didn't talk about it with someone he didn't know intimately.

But if he wanted Michael to know him, then this is where he had to start.

"After I lost my leg in Iraq, I was stationed in Atlanta for a year while I recuperated. I got out the following year, joined up with a great company in Manhattan, and I've been there ever since. It's a beautiful city. I think you'd like it, Guerin."

Alex wished he had the self-control to just keep staring out the window, but he had to see Michael's face. He had to know what Michael was thinking. But his side profile didn't tell him anything.

He desperately wanted to keep the lighthearted banter going, willing that thought to Michael across the crowded space of the Chevy. 

"You know, big cities aren't for me," Michael replied. "I need clean air. And I'm never giving up my cowboy boots."

Alex laughed genuinely. "I'm sure we could find you a honky-tonk bar in Times Square."

"Well, damn. Then maybe I'll think about planning a trip. Maybe you can give me some suggestions on where to stay." Michael's voice was dripping with innuendo, and it was doing many things to Alex.

He blushed and just turned the radio up a little louder as they continued on their drive.

When they got within the Albuquerque city limits just after noon, Michael began rattling off different places they passed by, and Alex tried to keep up, taking in the gorgeous scenery. He enjoyed New York, he really did, but there was something about New Mexico that was worming its way into Alex's heart.

"I wanted to take you to the zoo. It's a mild enough day for it. And then I thought we could get dinner at this place downtown," Michael said as they pulled into a parking lot. "Unless you think it will be too much on your leg. They do have a train we can ride to get from one end to the other."

This felt an awful lot like a first date, and Alex almost said as much before just smiling dreamily at Michael once the truck was parked. "I'll be fine, Michael. This is… let's get going. I want to see the giraffes."

***

They stayed at the zoo until closing.

Alex had never been to a zoo, and he walked around in awe of all the beautiful creatures, while Michael acted as a spontaneous tour guide, reading all the animal facts, so Alex didn't have to tear his eyes away from the animals.

It was undoubtedly the greatest non-date Alex had ever been on, and as they made their way to the restaurant around five, Alex realized that he'd felt lighter and less anxious than he had in a very long time. Even outside the worsening state of his relationship with Chuck, there was always a weight on his shoulders that he could never free himself from. It may have dulled at times and felt less pronounced, but it was still there pressing down on him and refusing to dissipate entirely.

But today, walking around in the crisp air with Michael next to him and the conversation flowing naturally, he felt an odd sense of peace within himself. And now that he had a taste of that peace, he wanted more.

His phone chimed in his pocket as they pulled up to the fancy looking Italian restaurant Michael had chosen for dinner. And when he looked at the screen, he saw it was a text from Chuck.

**_Chuck (5:48 pm): Hey. Are you free to talk tonight?_ **

**_Chuck (5:48 pm): I want to apologize for last night. I'm just a mess, Alex. I want to talk to you and work things out._ **

**_Alex (5:50 pm): You don't need to apologize. I have a lot going on today, but we can talk tomorrow. I promise you._ **

Alex turned his phone off and pocketed it before exiting the truck and following behind Michael.

The restaurant was stunning, a perfect mixture of old-world Italy and rustic New Mexico pueblo. Alex felt underdressed in his faded jeans and black sweater, and it honestly didn't seem at all like the kind of place Michael frequented. But he wasn't going to ruin this perfect day by mentioning that he would have been fine at a McDonald's. It was clear Michael put thought and effort into this day, and he was going to go with it.

They were seated at a table near the bar, which ended up being a mistake, as Michael immediately made best friends with the bartender since it was a slow night. As they made their way through bruschetta caprese, mussels and clams, lobster ravioli, and chicken scallopini, the bourbon glasses kept coming and coming until it was 8:30, and both Alex and Michael were satiated and drunk.

"Alex, please. It's on me," Michael said sweetly when the bill came.

Alex went to grab it out of habit, but he pulled his hand back at Michael's request.

"I dragged you out here, and I'm going to pay for dinner."

"You didn't drag me anywhere. I came of my own free will."

Michael raised his eyebrows. "And why did you come? I took you three hours away from Roswell, and you didn't even question it."

Alex wanted to scream 'Because I like you!', but he tamped that feeling down. "I guess I must trust you or something."

Alex and Michael continued to smile happily at each other like they'd been doing all night, talking about everything and nothing while the bill sat untouched between them. As Alex had come to expect, everything came easy between the two of them, and there were hardly any uncomfortable silences or forced laughter. It helped that the alcohol was flowing, of course, but Alex felt confident that it could always be like this with Michael, with or without the added spirits.

After the bill was settled, they stayed a few minutes longer, with Alex sipping on some water and Michael on a coffee.

"Look, I probably should have stopped drinking like three bourbons ago," Michael let out with a slight snicker. "Is there any way you'd want to maybe find a room to stay in for the night? I'll pay for two rooms since you've already got yourself a room that you're paying for back in Roswell. I just don't think I can make the drive tonight. I wasn't thinking, and I'm sorry."

Alex could tell that Michael felt terrible, so he suppressed the squeal he wanted to let out at the prospect of the two of them spending the night somewhere together. "It's fine, honestly. Today has been so much fun, and we both got a little carried away with the whiskey. We can sleep it off and head back first thing. But I can't let you buy two rooms. We'll split one and ask for double beds, okay?"

Michael's lips curved up into a smirk. "Alright, we can do that."

Alex got them an uber to a Days Inn, which was only 5 minutes away from where they were parked. The parking lot didn't appear crowded, and it didn't even cross Alex's mind that they wouldn't be able to get two double beds, but that was precisely what happened.

"How do you not have a room with two doubles?" He asked the teenage front desk clerk, who could barely be bothered to look him in the eye.

"Half the rooms are being renovated. We only have a few double rooms, and they're all occupied. We'd be happy to give you a room with a king at a discounted rate," the boy said robotically.

Alex turned back to Michael, who looked a little tipsy, and he shrugged his shoulders as if to say it was up to Alex. And Alex wanted to say, of course, because sharing a bed with Michael was like a dream he didn't even know two days ago he'd wish to come true. But even in his drunken haze, he knew it wasn't ideal to share a bed with a man he was that attracted to when he'd been drinking.

But what choice did they have?

"Fine. But I want that discounted rate."

Their room was on the third floor overlooking the covered pool area. The inside left a lot to be desired, but they were only using the space to rest their eyes for a few hours so they could get back on the road, back to Roswell.

They didn't have any belongings, no spare change of clothes, but that didn't stop Michael from jumping into the shower once they were inside.

Alex listened to the soft sound of the water through the paper-thin bathroom door. He turned on his phone for the first time in hours and saw he had four messages from Chuck, but he didn't have the brain capacity to even entertain them, so he put the phone on the table beside the bed and figured he could deal with it in the morning. He threw his jacket over the bed onto the desk next to the tv and took off his sweater, leaving him in just his undershirt, jeans, and boots. He was about 99% sure the bathtub wouldn't be accessible for him, and he was honestly too tired to shower anyway, so he decided to toe-off his boots and get under the covers, jeans, prosthesis, and all.

He was about five minutes into watching Die Hard when Michael emerged from the bathroom, a cloud of steam blowing out behind him. Alex took in Michael's wet curls dripping down his chiseled chest briefly before ripping his eyes away and back to the screen. Alex's whole body prickled with the heat of seeing a half-naked Michael out of his periphery walking around the room.

He chanced a chaste glance his way when he noticed Michael looking out the front window with his back to him. Michael was wearing his boxers and socks, and goddammit, even his butt was glorious.

"Last time I was in a Days Inn, I was in high school. My sister Isobel drug me to some hotel party," Michael said, turning around to face Alex with a whimsical grin on his face. "It was terrible. Isobel drank too much, and my brother Max had to pick us up. And he lectured us the whole way home. But I finally kissed David Andrews, so the night wasn't a total loss."

Alex was concentrating so hard on not letting his eyes slip away from Michael's face that he almost missed Michael's whole story. "I'm sorry, what?"

Michael looked confused. "What?"

"David Andrews?"

When it dawned on Michael what Alex was referring to, he laughed and then joined Alex on the bed, body staying above the covers. "I forget we don't know each other that well. It doesn't feel like it at times. I'm bisexual."

"Oh," Alex replied.

"Oh?"

"I just didn't realize."

Michael nodded a little as if thinking something over. "That's interesting."

"Why's that?"

Alex turned his body under the covers to face Michael, a scant few inches separating their shoulders. Michael had been looking at Alex's profile since he sat on the bed, but he brought his eyes back to the tv when he started talking. "Nothing really. I'm just losing my touch, that's all."

Alex wanted to ask what that meant, but even he knew that that could be a mistake in his current condition. 

All-day, it'd become increasingly clear that Alex was falling for Michael. While he'd felt something coming from Michael, he still wasn't totally convinced he wasn't misreading because he'd done that in the past with terrible consequences.

Now that he knew Michael _could_ be interested in him, things got a lot more complicated in Alex's mind. It's very easy to fall for a hot guy who lives a thousand miles away when you think he'd never like you back. It's pretty damn crazy and scary to suddenly let yourself believe that he might.

And man, he thought Michael might.

Alex turned up the tv volume a fraction and tried to make himself more comfortable under the covers, but it was a lost cause with the friction between his jeans, prosthesis, and tight sheets.

"Are you okay sharing the bed? I can take the floor. I've slept in way worse," Michael said s as he made a move to get off the bed, but Alex grabbed his wrist before he could get too far.

"No, no. You're fine. I think I just need to take my jeans off. And maybe my leg, if you don't mind." It took Alex a few seconds to remember he was holding Michael's wrist, and he dropped it like it had burned him.

"Of course, Alex. Please do whatever you need to do," Michael replied bashfully. "I just stripped without even asking if this was okay."

Alex sat up and laughed. "Like I would have said no."

They made eye contact, but Alex looked away first, as he threw his legs over the side of the bed. He wanted to scream at himself for saying that and making an uneasy situation ten times worse by trying to awkwardly flirt, knowing it wasn't smart.

But Michael just made him want to talk and go against every rational thought flitting around his head.

He thought about changing in the restroom, but he hadn't brought his crutch, and it was easier to change while sitting on the bed, so he started the process of removing his jeans and then unhooking his prosthetic.

When he turned to get back under the covers, he saw that Michael had stealthily gotten under them as well, hands tucked behind his head looking the sexiest wet cowboy Alex ever seen.

He turned off the light next to his side, and Michael followed suit a few seconds later. The sound of gunfire from the tv was the only sound littering the air for several minutes before Alex took the initiative to turn the tv off.

"Goodnight, Michael," Alex said softly, as he turned his back to Michael and faced the bathroom door.

"Alex?" Michael spoke up after a minute of silence.

"Yes?"

"Tell me something you've never told anyone."

Alex stayed perfectly still and didn't answer right away. He thought it over, wondering why Michael wanted to know, and also what he could tell him that wouldn't scare him away forever. There were many things for him to say because he didn't tell people much, but there was one story he swore he'd never tell anyone.

But he trusted Michael more than he could even comprehend.

"Um, when I was seventeen, I fell for this boy, William," Alex began, his body still turned away from Michael. "My family was in San Diego at the time, and we'd been there for about six months. I met Will the first day we got there because he lived next door. He was a military brat too, and we bonded right away over it. We were just so alike, and it was the first time I had a real friend in years. Anyway, I was a teenager, and he was the first boy ever to accept me and make me feel loved. He knew I was gay, and he never made me feel weird about it. One night we stole wine coolers from his Mom and were drinking in my garage when, I don't know, I just felt we were having a moment. So, I kissed him. And he kissed me back. I was so happy, Michael. It was just like this beautiful moment of finally feeling wanted and accepted by someone in my life. Anyway, that night I texted him later, and he didn't respond. My Dad came home late and asked me to come to the garage to talk with him. I guess Will freaked out about the kiss later that night and told his Mom, who then told my Dad. He, um, he beat me pretty good. I had four broken ribs, two black eyes, and a dislocated jaw. I had to finish my senior year at home. No one knew our family, so Dad just said I got into a car accident, and no one questioned a thing."

Michael didn't speak when Alex finally finished, and he was scared to turn over and face him, even in the dark. He'd managed to get through the whole story without crying, but as he sat there in the muted darkness, the tears started to form, and he didn't care to stop them.

"Turn around," Michael whispered.

Alex took a breath and then turned his body toward the man. There was a sliver of light coming in from the window, and it allowed Alex to see one of Michael's eyes. They were close enough to touch, and Michael bridged the distance between them and placed a hand on his forearm.

Alex melted into the touch and closed his eyes. "Was today a first date?"

Michael slowly moved his hand up and down Alex's arm. "Would it scare you if I said I hope so?"

"Yes," Alex answered quickly.

"I know this is crazy, but I feel something. I feel it every time I look at you. Every time I think about you. Which is all the time." He took his hand off Alex's arm and brought it to his cheek, smoothing a fallen tear into his warm skin. "I think you're incredible."

"This is crazy, Michael. We've known each other for two days. I had a boyfriend when this week started. I don't even live in New Mexico."

"I'm not asking for anything. I swear, I'm not. I understand this is complicated and fast, and a million other things that are telling you to push this away. But I want to keep getting to know you. I just want to spend time with you. Can we do that? Can we keep getting to know each other?"

Alex took Michael's hand from off his face and placed a soft kiss on his palm before placing it on the mattress between them and interlacing their fingers. "Goodnight, Michael."

“Goodnight, Alex.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Full disclosure, this is my favorite chapter because ugh, I love the idea of Michael just wanting to be with Alex and coming up with this whole day for them to spend together. And Alex is taking it all in and continuing to open himself up and share all these sides of himself because he's believing in their connection, even though it all feels so frenzied. 
> 
> Hallmark land is so good for them.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex starts to make plans for the inn, and the boys talk about cookies. Literally.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heading into the home stretch here means we're talking more about the inn. And I remind you that I have zero idea what this process would actually look like outside of a Lifetime movie 🙃

When Alex awoke, his hands still intertwined with Michael’s, he instinctively smiled as the first thing his eyes fell upon was Michael’s sleeping face. His curls were a mess atop his head, but he looked peaceful. And Alex wanted so desperately to reach out and run his hand down his golden skin just to feel even more of him.

Michael’s eyes flickered open a few minutes later, and Alex didn’t even pretend to look away, even though he knew watching another person sleep could definitely be perceived as creepy.

“Good morning,” Michael purred, voice deeper and raspier than usual. “You see something you like?”

A blush crept up Alex’s cheeks, and he tried to roll over and untangle his hands from Michael’s, but before he was able to, Michael pulled his shoulder back, and the action brought their bodies practically flush against one another. Alex licked his lips, and Michael mimicked the action just before the sexually charged moment was interrupted by Michael’s cell phone, which was ringing somewhere in the room.

Michael groaned and freed himself from Alex and the bed to retrieve it.

Alex took the opportunity to sit up and stretch before leaning over the bed to attach his prosthetic. He wasn’t sure who Michael was talking to, but he was asking a lot of questions to whoever was on the line, and the longer the conversation went on, the more agitated Michael became.

When he finally hung up, Michael started moving around the room quickly, pulling on his pants and his shirt in record speed.

“Hey. Is everything okay?” Alex asked as he began to dress. 

“Not really,” Michael exhaled. “One of the bathrooms flooded at the inn. And the night manager, Randy, has apparently been impossible to get a hold of, and Mercedes said the guest is freaking out. And I should be there, on-site, not three hours away.”

Alex felt a little like he’d been punched in the stomach at the comment, but he didn’t say anything back. Instead, he just moved around the room as fast as his legs would allow and got himself ready to leave as soon as possible.

They didn’t talk much as they fumbled around the room and made their way to the truck. It wasn’t until they’d been on the road for nearly twenty minutes that Michael finally spoke up. 

“Alex, I’m being a jerk,” Michael said once they settled on the highway headed for Roswell.

“It’s okay.”

“I don’t leave Roswell much anymore. Not that I ever did before, but especially now. The inn is kind of my whole life if you couldn’t tell.”

Alex peeked over at him, giving him a half-smile, before returning his eyes to the road. Alex’s brain was screaming for him to keep his hands firmly in his lap, but his left hand had a mind of its own, and he gently reached across the truck bench and placed his hand over Michael’s.

He watched Michael look down at their hands for a fraction of a second before he moved to link their fingers, making Alex’s heart swell. He leaned forward and turned the radio up, settling in more comfortably for the long ride home.

***

As soon as they were within Roswell city limits, Alex’s phone rang. And a quick peek at the screen told him it was someone from Roswell.

“Alex Manes.”

“Mr. Manes, hello! This is Martin Proctor of Proctor Realty. How are you this morning?”

Alex snuck a glance at Michael, feeling guilty all of a sudden. “I’m fine, thanks.”

“That’s great. Listen, my secretary forwarded me all the information you left with Pam, and I would love to meet with you today if you have time. I know you haven’t gotten a chance to sign the paperwork, but that’s just a formality. And I would love to get started on going over some options and ideas with you. The inn is an incredible piece of property, and I think we can get it sold in no time flat.” Martin talked a mile a minute and sounded like he was running or something with the intense wind sound coming through the phone.

“Um, yeah, sure. I should be available this afternoon,” Alex replied. He could feel Michael’s eyes on his cheek briefly, but he kept his eyes staring straight ahead.

“Excellent. My office is right downtown. I’ll text you the address, and we can meet about three? Wonderful. See you then.” He hung before Alex could get another word in.

Michael cleared his throat as Alex pocketed his phone. “Making new friends already?”

“Yeah, something like that,” Alex spit out. “You have dinner plans tonight?”

Michael pulled into the parking lot of Alex’s hotel and settled into a parking spot near his room before cutting the engine. “Are you asking me on a date?”

“I’m asking if you have dinner plans.”

Michael simpered and licked his lower lip slowly in a move that caused Alex to suck in a breath. “I think I’ll probably be at the inn late tonight.”

“Oh, okay.” Alex reached for the door handle, but a soft hand on his bicep stopped him before he opened it.

“What about a late dinner at my place?”

Alex looked over to Michael and shook his head, yes. “Sure. Text me later?”

“Damn straight,” Michael said with an exaggerated wink.

Alex rolled his eyes playfully before getting out of the truck. He turned around to look at Michael one last time and heard the roar of the truck coming back to life. He was greeted with Michael’s captivating smile as he waved and then headed out of the lot.

***

Martin Proctor was a portly man, with a gorgeous mane of silver hair and a hearty laugh. His modest office was decked out in Christmas charm, much like all of Roswell, and he even had a giant alien with a sold sign on it sitting in the corner of his office.

He jabbered so fast that Alex had to ask him to slow down several times as he rattled on and on about a client of his who was already interested in the property. From what he gathered, his client gobbled up properties left and right, and then sold them off, which wasn’t exactly what he was interested in happening.

“Listen, Martin. I would love to get all this figured out as soon as possible. But I’m not willing to just sell the inn to the highest bidder,” Alex said, leaning back in the stuffy office chair across from Martin’s desk. “This inn is important to people, and I won’t sell it to someone who’s going to knock it down or completely rebrand it. I’m not interested in that.”

In the twenty minutes Alex had been in his presence, Martin had never stopped smiling, but his face finally faltered a bit. “Okay, Alex. I hear you. I do. But how about you just meet my client. I think you’ll find him to be a fair man, and then we can go from there. What do you say?”

Honestly, what could Alex say to that? He wasn’t interested in owning and running the inn, and he wasn’t interested in dragging this out either. Even though he was loving getting to know Michael, he was acutely aware of the fact that it most likely wasn’t going to go anywhere, even though he was slowly and surely becoming attached. The ghost of his relationship with Chuck was still freshly lingering all around him, and he didn’t live in Roswell and was never going to live in Roswell, so how would they make things work?

But even knowing this, he wasn’t going to waste his time here overthinking things too much because he was having the most fun he’d had in years just being around the man.

“Alright. When can I meet him?”

Martin beamed and slapped his hands dramatically on the desk. “I will give him a call this evening, and I will set up a meeting as soon as possible. How does that sound?”

Alex nodded and plastered on a smile he didn’t mean. “Sure. Just give me a call when you figure out a time.”

He and Martin shook hands, and Alex left the office, finding himself on a bustling Roswell sidewalk. Directly next to Martin’s office was a bakery, and Alex figured it wasn’t the worst idea in the world to bring over some cookies to Michael’s that evening.

**_Alex (4:11 pm): What’s your favorite kind of Christmas cookie?_ **

**_Michael (4:14 pm): How many kinds of Christmas cookies are there?_ **

**_Alex (4:15 pm): Quite a few_ **

**_Alex (4:16 pm): I’m looking at gingerbread, sugar, peanut butter blossoms, snickerdoodle, thumbprint, shortbread…_ **

**_Alex (4:16 pm): Something that looks like a reindeer_ **

**_Michael (4:18 pm): A couple of each?_ **

**_Alex (4:19 pm): Perfect_ **

**_Michael (4:20 pm): Since you got dessert, what are you thinking for dinner? I can whip up some spaghetti. Or we can get crazy and have breakfast for dinner_ **

**_Alex (4:22 pm): You know how to make a western omelet?_ **

**_Michael (4:23 pm): I won’t dignify that question with an answer_ **

**_Alex (4:24 pm):_ ** **_😊_ **

**_Alex (4:24 pm): Breakfast for dinner it is_ **

Alex put his phone in his jeans and ordered an assortment of cookies from the bustling bakery. He got himself a glazed donut to go and was happily munching away when he felt his phone start to vibrate. He pulled it out and was surprised to see Michael calling.

“Hey,” he said coolly.

“Hey. I, uh, I was going to text, but I thought it’d be easier if I called you,” Michael started, and Alex could quickly sense the nervousness in his voice even over the phone. “I don’t have a house.”

Alex laughed softly despite himself. “Okay. So then, where exactly am I going tonight?”

Michael huffed. “You’re coming to my airstream.”

Alex didn’t quite understand why Michael felt the need to call him and almost warn him about this until he was taken back to that stormy night at the Pony when he was stupidly boasting about how nice his condo was. Michael may have been feeling a little self-conscious, and Alex felt awful.

“Okay, Michael. I look forward to seeing it,” Alex stated warmly. “I look forward to seeing you.”

“Me too. I’m going to try to get out of here as early as I can. Will nine work for you?”

“I’ve got all the time in the world today.”

“What are you up to now? Besides looking at Christmas cookies?”

Alex chuckled. “I was thinking about grabbing some coffee and maybe hitting up this boutique I passed while I was walking around town.”

“Ah, well, enjoy your afternoon. And I will most definitely see you tonight.”

Alex beamed back into the phone. “You will.”

“Oh, Alex,” Michael stammered a bit. “I found some decorations at the inn that we didn’t put out this year. I thought maybe we could decorate my trailer. If you don’t want to, it’s not a big deal. I can do it myself another time.”

Alex’s cheeks started to twitch from how hard he was cheesing. “I would love to. Want me to grab anything while I’m out?”

“No, no. Just bring yourself tonight. I’ll see you later, okay?”

“It’s a date.”

Alex heard Michael laugh a little before the phone disconnected, and he could kick himself. The butterflies had seldom stopped swirling since he laid eyes on Michael, and it was getting worse and worse as the days went by.

He’d never been into Christmas like most people were. It wasn’t until he was 11, he had a Christmas where he got toys his brothers didn’t bully away from him. And that was only because they were too old to care at that point. And by toys, he meant the two his father would get from a drug store and stick under the tree unwrapped.

After Alex had gone to school when he was seven and told the class that he hadn’t gotten anything for Christmas, his father came home that night with a GI Joe and a switch that he beat across Alex’s backside. From that Christmas on, Alex got something small and cheap, his father’s way of making sure Alex would never be able to say his father was neglecting him again on a holiday.

As an adult, he never got into the holiday spirit. He never got a Christmas tree or hung lights around his house. Christmas was just another day in his life, and he was okay with that for the most part. It helped being with someone like Chuck, who respected Alex enough to never push Christmas on him.

But there was something about this trip that had Alex feeling like he wouldn’t mind gorging out on Christmas cookies, hanging lights around Michael’s trailer, and listening to Christmas songs. It sounded like the only thing in the world he wanted to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I took a little time off because the last week was very stressful. But I'm hoping to wrap this story up very soon for you guys. 
> 
> And thank you for every kudo, comment, bookmark, etc. Considering I was very close to trashing this story, I'm so glad so many of you are finding some enjoyment here. We could all use some joy these days.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael and Alex decorate the airstream, talk, and more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You'll see some mild sexual content in this chapter.

Alex changed four times before settling on a puffy green sweater, a pair of dark jeans, and combat boots. He could feel the nerves sifting through his cells as he made the drive over to Michael's trailer, which he soon learned was located in a junkyard not too far from the inn.

To this point, they'd had multiple meals together and slept in the same bed, but there was something about this hangout that felt different for Alex. He felt like Michael inviting him into his home and making him dinner (well, omelets, but STILL) was a big step.

Even before he found companionship with Chuck, he never went on many dates or did more than occasionally hook up with a guy he met when he forced himself to go out for a drink once in a while. He'd always found it hard to connect to others, and the situation with William had done a number on him, not only spurring his decision to join the Air Force but also his unwillingness to put that much trust or faith in another person. Especially romantically.

He thought of Chuck briefly as he pulled up to the junkyard where Michael's airstream was gleaming under the New Mexico stars. They'd talked briefly earlier, and it was clear that Chuck was currently in the anger stage of change, which was unlike him. He got annoyed and frustrated like most everyone, but he didn't get angry. He and Alex never fought much or disagreed, and looking back on it now, he realized that had a lot to do with his utter indifference to their union as a whole.

It left him feeling shitty inside for having wasted over a year of a wonderful man's life, but he did his best to stamp down that sadness as he got out of his car with the box of cookies tucked under his arm.

He knocked on the door and waited a few seconds for Michael to open up. And when he did, Alex audibly sighed.

Michael's blue jeans look painted on, and his v-neck white t-shirt was clinging to his chest in all the right places. He topped off the look with a sandy-colored ribbed cardigan that was hanging on his broad shoulder perfectly. Michael always looked tasty, but there was something about the way he looked in this moment that had Alex ready to push him into the small space and kiss him senseless.

Instead, he held out the cookies. "Hey. You look great, Michael."

Michael looked sheepish as he accepted the box. "Thanks. You always look good."

Alex accepted the compliment and smiled back stupidly until Michael moved aside and beckoned him in. Once inside, Alex could smell the fresh scent of eggs, and his stomach rumbled a bit as he took in Michael's home.

He hadn't known what to expect, but he knew from the phone call earlier that Michael felt a need to warn him ahead of time, and he wasn't about to do or say anything to make him feel bad about the place he laid his head. Plus, there was a warmth and a charm about the trailer that Alex was already feeling infatuated with.

"I know it's not much," Michael said as he busied himself with platting an omelet. He handed the plate to Alex and nodded at him to sit down, so he did and soon realized he was sitting on Michael's bed.

"Michael, I like it. It's very you."

"I know it's not some fancy New York penthouse, but it's home." His back was to Alex, and Alex seriously contemplated putting the plate down and just spinning him around to look him in the eyes and tell him how amazing he thought anything and everything involving Michael Guerin was.

But he didn't.

"Yeah, well, fancy New York penthouses are not all they're cracked up to be. This is about the most at home I've felt in maybe my whole life." Alex said the last part under his breath and quickly filled his mouth with egg. He knew it wasn't quite so mumbled when Michael turned around to look at him.

"What do you mean by that?"

Alex chewed carefully, buying himself some time. "I told you a little bit about my childhood, which was a nightmare. We moved all over, and it's hard to feel at home when you're not even sure anyone in your family even cares about you. Then the Air Force, which meant years all over the world, with nothing stable to go back to. My apartment and New York, in general, is the closest thing to a home I've ever had because it's mine. But it's just a big place with walls and furniture and some okay memories. But this place is, this is a home. Every single thing in here just screams Michael Guerin. It's wonderful."

Michael considered him for a few seconds, eyes dancing across his face and settling on his lips for a long while. When he finally walked over, Alex could feel the desire radiating off him, and he knew what was about to happen. And he wanted it, he really wanted it, but there was also a massive part of him that was spiraling.

Michael took the plate from Alex and deposited it somewhere. Alex wasn't paying enough attention to care, eyes glued to Michael's chest, which was inches from his face. Slowly Michael placed his hands on Alex's shoulders, slow enough that Alex could stop him at any moment if he wanted to. He knelt down on either side of Alex's thighs and straddled him, arms still attached to Alex's shoulder.

"You can't just say stuff like that, Alex," he whispered, bringing his forehead to Alex's, their skin practically fusing.

"I meant it."

"I don't know what's happening here, but _fuck_ , I like you."

"I like you, too."

"No, Alex. I don't think you get it. I've never met someone in my life that I just want on every single level. I've dated people, and I've been with people in different ways, but this is like nothing I've ever experienced. Tell me you feel it too."

Alex lets his eyes close and breathed out evenly. "I do. I do, Michael."

"I wanna kiss you so bad." The words were barely spoken before Alex closed the short gap between their mouths and united their lips for the first time.

A heat pooled in Alex's stomach as their mouths got to know one another, Michael's lips tasting sweet and slick against his. The kiss was soft-hearted at first, and Alex got used to the feel before parting his lips and allowing Michael's tongue to infiltrate his mouth. When their tongues started to dance around each other, he was powerless to the way his hips thrust up into Michael, who was still straddling him.

Alex grabbed Michael's hips to steady them both, while Michael moved his hands into Alex's hair, and they stayed locked like that, kissing, moaning, grinding until Michael pulled back, leaving Alex's lips weathered and tingling.

"Are we doing this?" Michael's breathe tickled Alex's fragile lips.

"God, I want to," Alex answered honestly.

"But?"

"But I just don't know about us sleeping together," Alex spit out, hating how wrecked his voice sounded. "I've been trying to just go with things, but this connection just keeps getting stronger, and I don't know, Michael."

Alex expected Michael to climb off his lap, but he leaned forward instead and placed a hot kiss on his forehead. "I understand. I could kiss you all night. Or we can finish these eggs then put up the decorations."

"Let's do it."

***

Michael didn't have a ton of decorations to put up, but the ones he did have were adorable and perfectly matched the trailer's rustic charm.

They hung white lights around the walls, and a little rickety Santa Claus that twisted his hips and sang 'Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree' when you pressed its hand was put in the corner by the bathroom. They decorated the other end of the trailer with a small Christmas tree with an assortment of colored lights affixed to it and a little gold star on the top.

"Hank told me he bought this at a thrift store the first Christmas after he got the Starlight. We used to put it on the dining room table, and every year, Hank would put one ornament on it. Whichever ornament he chose that year was supposed to signify what he hoped to come the following year," Michael said as the two men stood shoulder to shoulder and looked down upon the miniature tree. "Last Christmas, he chose a globe ornament. He said he wanted to see more of the world this year. But that didn't quite work out for him."

They let a comfortable silence sweep over them, continuing to stare at the lights, seemingly lost in their thoughts. Alex's eyes landed on a box on the floor that seemed to have a few bulbs lying on some crumpled newspaper. He reached down to pick the box up and placed it down next to the tree.

"What do you say we keep the tradition alive?" Alex asked.

"There's are all pretty boring, though. Not sure what a silver bulb is going to mean for the new year."

Alex shrugged. "Do you have a sharpie?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"Let's each write one word on each side of the bulb. One word to describe what we want in the new year."

Michael seemed a little skeptical, but he reached into a random drawer and handed Alex a black pen.

Alex wrote down his word immediately and handed it to Michael. "Don't peek!"

Michael playfully rolled his eyes and took the bulb carefully. It took him quite a few seconds longer than Alex to come up with his word, but he eventually wrote it down and then handed the bulb back to Alex.

"You go first," Michael commissioned.

Alex hooked the blub onto a branch with his word facing out in tiny uppercase letters. "I chose growth. It used to be very hard to look myself in the mirror. When you go to war, you see things, and you do things that you can't even begin to describe sometimes. And after I lost my leg, I was going through months and months of therapy and just wondering what it was all for. But it got better. And this trip has shown me that it can continue to get better for me. So, this new year I want to keep on growing and working on myself."

Alex had spoken mostly to the tree, but he turned to see Michael with a whimsical look on his face. Alex nudged him with his shoulder, prompting Michael to reposition the bulb, so his word was now facing them.

"Um, I chose memories," Michael started. "I don't have any. Not really. Maybe there's something here and there if I think hard enough. Reconnecting with my siblings is probably the best one. But good things don't happen for me consistently. That being said, since I've met you, I feel like there are great memories out there just waiting to be had. And I hope I get to make some with you."

"Jesus, Michael."

Michael crowded into Alex's space, and he closed his eyes, bracing himself for a kiss, but was pleasantly surprised by the feeling of warmth as Michael wrapped him in a tight hug. They stayed like that for several minutes, swaying slightly to a silent tune that only they could hear. 

***

"We should stop!" Michael bellowed as Alex pulled his lips off Michael's collarbone and whined.

After the tree lighting, they broke open the cookies and watched three episodes of The Office before Alex had Michael pinned underneath him, kissing all the skin he could find. Their kissing had progressed to a lot of over the clothes touching, and both men were teetering on the edge.

They were either going to fall over the cliff or regain their footing. And the time to decide was now.

Alex rolled off Michael and collapsed to his left side. He brought a hand down to his crotch to relieve some of the pressure and noticed Michael was doing the same, causing them both to bust out laughing.

"Damn, you know how to kiss." Alex refused to look at Michael's face as he said it, but he could feel the smugness emanating from him.

"I think it's all you. I don't think I've ever kissed softer lips in my life."

"How many lips have you kissed?" Alex meant it to be a light-hearted question, but he felt Michael tense up a little in the confines of the small bed.

Michael turned over to lay on his elbows and stomach, looking down at Alex. "A few. Why?"

"It was just a question."

"Did Maria say something to you?"

Alex moved his body, so he was sat up more squarely, a puzzled look on his face. "No one told me anything. It was an innocent question. Is there something you're not telling me?"

Michael huffed out a deep breath. "Look, Roswell is a small town. And for a long time, I was known as the town drunk who slept around. It was before I started working at the inn, and it was after a rough time in my life."

Alex laughed a little despite himself. "You were a little promiscuous back in the day? I don't care about that kind of stuff, Michael."

"But I do," Michael began, his eyes suddenly sad and a mouth a tight line. "I was kinda forced to grow up fast. And I just didn't have any direction in my life, so I drank, and I slept around, and I got into fights with anyone I could find. I was just looking for something or someone to make me feel something. It was a phase, I guess, that lasted for far too long. It wasn't until I met Hank and he kind of took me under his wing, that I got my shit together."

Alex listened with rapt attention. He wanted to reach out and tell Michael that it was all okay, but deep inside, he knew that Michael needed to say this all out loud. He wanted to share this part of himself, and Alex was more than willing to let him.

"Anyway, I got my life right, and Maria was my first real relationship. She put up with a lot, and she's going to be a good friend of mine for life. I'm just really embarrassed about that time in my life, and I don't want to disappoint you in any way."

Alex rushed forward to put his arms around Michael's shoulders, their bodies once again slotting together like puzzle pieces. "I hear everything you're saying, Michael. But nothing you just told me makes me feel any differently about you. We all have a past. And your past is what makes you who you are. Please do not feel like you have to hide parts of yourself from me. I know how I come across, but I don't care about that kind of stuff. I promise you. Please trust me. I've told you more about myself over the past few days than I've told anyone in my life."

Michael pulled away from Alex slightly and looked him dead in the eye. "I trust you with my life."

Alex kissed him deeply, willing all the complicated emotions coursing through him into the kiss, hoping Michael felt how much he desired him and trusted him. He knew he was giving mixed signals right now with the intensity of this third make-out session, but he couldn't help the way his body reacted to Michael's touch, nor could he control the sounds filling the airstream.

Within minutes, Alex was rubbing his palm against Michael's hard-on, relishing in the soft moans escaping Michael's mouth in between languid, sloppy kisses that were loud in the relative quiet. When Michael started to unzip his jeans, he knew he should stop him again and reiterate his earlier position, but he wanted Michael so badly. He wanted to feel him come apart in his hands, and he wanted Michael to touch every fiber of his being until he struggled to recognize up from down.

He just wanted Michael.

So, he had him.

When they'd both come down from their orgasm high, Michael reached over to grab the box of cookies, and they each sampled every single kind of cookie left in the box. Alex decided he liked the gingerbread cookies the best, while Michael opted for the reindeer one.

Around three, an exhausted Alex reminded Michael that he had to head back to his hotel room, but Michael stopped him from climbing out of bed and asked him to stay the night. Alex raised his eyebrows in curiosity, wondering if Michael wanted to go another round, but Michael shook his head slowly.

"I just want to sleep next to you. If that's alright."

It was more than alright, and Alex thought in that moment he might do something stupid like telling a man he'd known for a few days that he was in love with him.

He kept his mouth closed, but damn if the words weren't on the tip of his tongue as he rested his weary head on Michael's warm, fuzzy chest and drifted off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And then I go and spoil it all by saying somethin' stupid like, "I love you". Love that song and love these boys 😪


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex officially inherits the inn, and an unexpected guest shows up.

Alex reluctantly had to leave Michael's embrace early the next morning once he'd finally gotten word that Roger was back in the office, meaning it was time for him to sign the paperwork and officially inherit the Starlight. 

The whole ride back to town, Alex thought about how amazing the night with Michael had been. Their emotional connection was undeniable, and they quickly learned that the physical was just as strong. Alex felt like he was floating when he was with Michael, his body just reacting and relaxing in a way it never had with anyone else.

He knew he was a goner, and it probably didn't make sense, but Alex had never been so sure of anything in his entire life; he was meant to meet Michael Guerin.

Roger's office was bustling with activity for such a small space, but seeing as how he'd been out of the office for a few days, it made sense that all his missed appointments were rescheduled in the final days before Christmas.

Even with the busy waiting room, Alex was led back to Roger's spacious office as soon as he arrived. And he was immediately taken with the older gentleman, who had a kind smile and an infectious nature about him that Alex found incredibly captivating.

"I'm so sorry, Mr. Manes," Roger said graciously, running a hand through his fluffy gray hair. "I know in your email you wanted to get in and get out of Roswell as soon as possible. I hope I haven't held up your plans too much with my absence."

Alex waved his hand carelessly. "Please, call me Alex. And it's fine. I've been enjoying my time in Roswell, actually."

Roger looked pleased. "I'm glad to hear that. You know, I was Hank's lawyer for many, many years and his friend for even longer. We had a lot of talks throughout the years. And I know he wasn't close with you boys after falling out with your father, but he kept an eye on all of you. He was so proud of your service."

Alex's first instinct was to nod politely and move on, but there was something calming about Roger that made Alex want to ask more about the grandfather he, unfortunately, failed to truly know. "I know you're busy, but would you mind telling me a little bit about him."

"Of course, of course," Roger said, looking slightly past Alex wistfully. "Hank was a hilarious guy. He had a little bit of a dry sense of humor, but he would walk into a room and have everyone laughing. And he was wicked smart. I knew everything there was to know about American History. You know, he tried to see you boys more over the years when you were growing up, but your father forbid it. I think one of the great regrets of his life was that he wasn't in the life of you and your brothers as adults."

"Well, I didn't make it easy. I haven't spoken to anyone in my family in years. I turned eighteen, and I left all of it behind."

Roger reached into his desk and pulled out a manila envelope. "When Hank decided to buy the inn, we talked for hours and hours about whether or not it was the right thing for him to do. He had to borrow a lot of money, and he had to pretty much dedicate his life to running it in the beginning. But he was so happy. And when we drafted up his will, he told me that he wanted to leave it to you because he wanted to leave it in the hands of someone he loved and admired."

Alex inhaled deeply through his nostrils, trying to keep the tears and his complicated feelings buried within. "He didn't even know me."

Roger opened the envelope and pulled out what looked like a thick contract, as well as a folded piece of lined paper. "I have the paperwork right here. You just sign in a couple of places, and the inn is yours. And then this, this is a letter from Hank. He wrote it shortly before his death and told me that it wasn't to be given to you until the inn was officially yours."

Alex spent the next few minutes reading through the paperwork and signing where Roger told him to. When all was said and done, he set the pen down on the desk and officially became the Starlight Inn Bed and Breakfast owner.

He waited until he was outside on the street to open up the folded letter Roger handed him earlier. An odd sense of nostalgia warmed-over him as he saw his grandfather's chicken scratch writing, remembering birthday and Christmas cards from a lifetime ago.

**_Dear Alex,_ **

**_I hate to start a letter like this, but if you're reading this letter, I'm gone. And you're now the owner of the Starlight._ **

**_I know we haven't spoken or seen each other in years, but you've always been in my heart, son. You and all your brothers. I wish things had been different, but this is the hand we were dealt, and we have to live with it._ **

**_As a kid, you were smart as a whip. And you were brave. I know you made your own path, and I'm proud of you for doing what was best for you._ **

**_I hope you've found happiness._ **

**_After your grandmother passed when you were young, I was lost for so many years. I didn't know what to do, and one day I just decided to do something for myself. So, I bought the Starlight. It was one of the greatest decisions of my life. And I'm leaving it to you because I trust that you'll do whatever you feel is best for it._ **

**_I trust you, Alexander. And I love you._ **

**_I hope you've found peace in this life. And I hope we get to meet again on the other side._ **

**_All my love,_ **

**_Pop-Pop_ **

Alex suddenly found himself on a random sidewalk in Roswell, New Mexico, on the verge of a full-blown crying session when his phone started ringing in his pocket. His eyes were misty, and he answered the phone without looking at who was calling, expecting it to be Martin with a time for their meeting later that day.

"Alex Manes."

"Hey, Alex," Chuck said with evident hesitation. "Is everything okay?"

Alex cleared his throat and hastily wiped at his eyes. "Chuck. Um, yeah. What's up?"

"I was hoping we could talk."

Alex silently cursed and shook his head before speaking back up. "It's not the best time. I've got a lot going on, but I should be back in the city in a few days."

"Well, um, I didn't mean over the phone. I'm here. In Roswell. I'm at your hotel right now."

"What?" Alex knew he screamed the word out, and a few passerby's shot him looks, but he didn't care an iota. "Why are you in Roswell?"

Chuck sighed. "You broke up with me over the phone like a day after you left the state, and you won't talk to me about it. I'm here to talk."

"I didn't move away forever. I will literally be home in a couple of days. Why are you ambushing me?"

"Whoa, ambushing? Kind of like how you ambushed me by breaking my heart over the fucking phone?"

Alex knew he needed to get off the street because he was about to make a scene, so he started the walk to his rental, parked across the street. Once he settled inside the car, he took a few calming breathes before he dared speak again.

"I'm not trying to be an asshole about this, okay. But this is overwhelming."

"I just want to talk to you, and I couldn't wait any longer. Just come back to your hotel and let's talk. I think you owe me that much."

Alex thought it over. He didn't want to sit in his cramped hotel room to have this conversation, and the only place he really knew in town at this point was the Crashdown. Michael had a busy day, and the chances of him going there today were slim, so Alex decided to tell Chuck to meet him at the restaurant.

It wasn't like he was trying to hide from Michael, but the last thing he would want is for Michael to see him and Chuck together after the night they shared last night.

_What the fuck have I gotten myself into?_ Alex pondered as he put the car in gear and made his way to the otherworldly diner.

***

Chuck found the diner with relative ease, and Alex was only waiting there for about ten minutes before he showed up.

The first thing Alex noticed was how tired he looked. Chuck was typically always well put together and rather radiant at all times, but his ordinarily crisp hair was un-styled, and his eyes had bags underneath. Alex couldn't help but wonder if this was just the side effects of travel or the breakup.

Either way, a piece of Alex's heart ached.

"Hey," Chuck whispered, sliding into the empty seat across from Alex.

They were seated toward the back of the establishment, and Alex had a clear view of the front door. "Hi."

"We can skip the small talk if that's okay," Chuck opened, hands nervously drumming across the table. "I just want to know why. And I was hoping you could look me in the eye when you say it because I thought we were happy. I mean, weren't you happy? I know everything wasn't always exciting but was it so bad you had to break up with me the minute you got away from me?"

Alex placed his hands over Chuck's and gave them a little squeeze. "You're a great person. And I'm sorry that I've hurt you. I'm so, so sorry. But this just wasn't going to work because my heart wasn't in it. And I think I knew that for a long time, but I was too cowardly to say anything."

Chuck cast his eyes away from Alex and didn't speak for several long beats. But Alex never removed his hand, rubbing tiny little circles into Chuck's palms.

They sat like that in relative silence for several long moments until the waitress came over to bring them the coffees Alex had ordered before. But it wasn't the teenager who had taken Alex's order when he first got in there; it was Liz Ortecho.

"Alex. Hey!" Liz beamed at him. "It's so good to see you again."

Alex instinctively pulled his hand away from Chuck and settled it on his lap. "Hey. How are you?"

"Busy as usual. But my Papi needed some help today, so I'm filling in," she said, finally taking notice of Chuck, who was watching their conversation curiously. "Um, can I get you guys something to eat?"

"No, we're good with the coffees," Alex replied, trying his best to sound light and airy even though he was silently freaking out on the inside.

The last thing he needed was Michael hearing that his very recent ex showed up unannounced, and they were holding hands at the Crashdown before he got a chance to tell him first. He'd only known Michael a few days, but much like himself, he was a little touchy and wouldn't want to be caught by surprise with news like that.

"You got it!" Liz strolled away to chat with another table. And just as Alex went to release an anxious breath he didn't even realize he was holding, he saw another familiar face stroll into the Crashdown.

Maria saw Liz first and waved at her before her eyes settled on Alex. He smiled back as brightly as he could manage, hoping she would just smile and wave and go about her business.

That didn't happen.

"Hey!" Maria was cheery and bright and dressed impeccably like she was headed for bigger things than a diner. "I was hoping I'd get to see you again before you left us."

Alex blushed. "I'm here for at least a few more days."

"Oh yeah? Well, you will have to stop by the Pony before you go."

"Of course."

"Where are my manners," Maria said, bestowing her award-winning smile on Chuck. "I'm Maria DeLuca. And you are?"

"Chuck Nickles. I'm Alex's boyfriend."

To her credit, Maria only let her face falter for a fraction of a second before that smile was back. "It's nice to meet you, Chuck. I'd love for you to stop into the Pony as well while you're in town."

"The Pony?"

"The Wild Pony. It's my bar across town," Maria began before looking over at Liz, who was eyeing their table up from behind the counter. "I'm going to get out of your hair here. But I would like to see you guys before you leave town."

Maria was gone in a hurry to chat with Liz, leaving Alex and Chuck again stuck in their awkward bubble.

"So, you made some friends, I see." There was a snark in Chuck's tone that put Alex on the defensive.

"Everyone has been very friendly," Alex shot back. "Look, you know I'm not experienced with all of this. I never wanted to hurt you, but I had to be honest with you. And the truth is that I didn't want to be in this relationship anymore. And I'm so sorry to have to say that."

Chuck nodded, eyes glistening with tears. Alex wanted to sidle over to him and hug him, but he stayed in place and waited for Chuck to say more. But more never came.

They drank their coffee, and Alex paid the small tab upfront before they walked outside and stood awkwardly on the sidewalk.

"Guess I'll head back to my hotel." Chuck's words were low and unsure. "You remember my cousin, Stacy? She's in Dallas now. Think I might go see her tomorrow."

Alex gave him a small smile. "That's nice."

"You know I was hoping you'd come with me. I thought seeing you in person meant we could talk this out more, but I don't even recognize you right now, Alex. You've only been gone a few days, but you're different. You're lighter. I guess a few days away from me made you happier, huh?" Chuck said the words with so much sadness that Alex pulled him into an embrace before he could even register what was happening.

They stayed hugging for several minutes, the last goodbye for Alex and hopefully the same for Chuck. When they finally parted, Chuck leaned in to kiss Alex. It was quick and without passion, and Alex leaned into it, giving him that final bit of closure. It was the last piece of the goodbye tango they found themselves engaged in.

"Bye." Chuck gave his arm a small pinch before walking away.

Alex brought his fingers up to his lips as he watched his first boyfriend walk away. It was hard to understand the emotions flooding through him, but he felt a great sense of relief that Chuck would be okay now. 

He was so immersed in his thoughts and feelings, the cold air an afterthought as it beat against his cheeks, that he missed the screeching tires of an old Chevy coming from somewhere close behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GUYS!!! I had to do it! 🙈🙈🙈
> 
> RIP Chex! A solid relationship that has finally been put to rest. 
> 
> I'm working on the ending now (there might end up being three more chapters, instead of two, sorry!) and I want to get it right for you guys! I'm hoping to post this weekend.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex takes a meeting, and a confrontation ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This isn't going to be wrapped up in one more chapter so two more are coming your way!

Alex's meeting with Martin and his client was scheduled for four at the inn, and Alex got there a few minutes early, wanting to see Michael beforehand. But as he pulled up, he noticed his truck wasn't in the designated manager spot on the side of the house.

**_Alex (3:47 pm): Hey you. I'm at the inn meeting with a realtor. I was hoping to see you today. Drinks tonight?_ **

"Mr. Manes!" Martin's booming voice assaulted Alex's ears, as he and a younger gentleman descended upon him as he exited his sedan.

"Hi," Alex said politely, extending his hand to the man.

"Nice to see you again," he said, shaking it firmly. "This is my client, Wyatt Long."

Wyatt had a smug air about him that immediately turned Alex off to the man. And he barely shook Alex's hand, as if he almost couldn't be bothered, which was another major strike against him.

When they made their way into the inn, Carla was sweeping the foyer area, and her face lit up when she saw Alex, but her eyes dimmed a bit when she caught sight of the other gentleman.

"Mr. Manes, hello! Lovely to see you," she greeted him warmly before narrowing her eyes at Proctor and the Long man. Something was amiss between the three of them, but Alex had no idea what it was.

"It's lovely to see you, too," Alex began. "Is there a place where the three of us could go to talk?"

"Hank and Mr. Michael both worked out of the office you were in the other evening. Do you remember the way?"

"Yes, thank you."

Alex motioned for the men to follow him deeper into the inn, and they walked back to the office, with the two men settling into the chairs across from the big desk. Alex didn't feel comfortable sitting at someone else's desk, so he stood behind it, leaning over the top of the black swirling chair nestled up against the wood.

"Look, we can skip all the formalities here," Wyatt leaned forward in his chair, a cocky half-grin on his lips. "Whatever price you're selling, I'll match it plus ten percent."

"Excuse me?"

"I said, I will pay whatever you want. Plus, ten percent. We can get this done quick and easy, get you back to wherever it is you're from before the holiday, and have this all wrapped up by the new year."

Every single word out of Wyatt's mouth was dripping with arrogance. Alex made a habit of not doing business with men he couldn't stand to be in the same room as, and Alex knew after a whopping five minutes that Wyatt Long was not the kind of man he wanted to do business with.

"Why are you in such a rush to push through this sale?"

Wyatt scoffed. "I would think you'd be happy about that. You can get back to your life, and you can leave the Starlight in the hands of a prominent member of the Roswell community."

The man's emphasis on the word 'prominent' didn't go unnoticed by Alex, or Martin, who looked wildly uncomfortable. And his expression only dimmed further when the office door burst open, and Michael came barreling in looking like he was primed for a fight. Carla was a few steps behind him, but she stayed by the door.

Gone was the softness from Michael's face that Alex remembered vividly from the time he spent worshipping Michael's body in the wee hours of the morning, replaced with a square jaw and a fury in Michael's eyes that he had yet to see.

At first, it wasn't clear what had Michael so upset, as his eyes darted back and forth between both Wyatt and Alex for a time before settling and releasing all his wrath onto the smarmy man a few feet away from him.

"Get out of here, Long! Now!"

"Michael, let's calm down here, okay." Alex put his hands up in the air like he was trying not to frighten a scared kitten.

Michael didn't even bother to glance his way. "Long, you have five minutes to get off this property, or I swear to god."

For as domineering and threatening as Michael was being, Wyatt looked amused and even smiled back at the threats. "Last time I checked, you don't own this place. You can't make me do anything."

"Gentleman, gentleman, let's all take a few breathes here, okay?" Martin tried his best to act as the "adult" in the room, but one look from Michael had him shrinking back into his cheap suit.

"You know you're not welcome here. I want you off the property, Long!"

"Michael, can we talk outside for a minute?" Alex interjected with a slight edge to his voice.

"Yeah, Michael," Wyatt drew out his name in a mocking tone, and Alex stepped forward to forcibly push Michael out of the room before he could charge Wyatt where he sat.

Carla quickly strolled down the hallway and out of view, and when the door slammed shut behind them, Michael ripped his arm away from Alex's grasp in a move that had Alex reeling. They walked a few paces away from the door before either one spoke.

"What the hell is going on, Michael? What was that?"

Michael laughed bitterly, a strange noise in the confines of the old house. "Do you have any idea who that guy is? Of course, you don't. You don't give a shit about this in, or you would have done some research about the people you brought into it."

Alex pulled at his hair a bit, confused and beginning to boil over with rage. "I just met that guy today. Martin set up this meeting."

"Ha! Martin Proctor is a snake." Now it was Michael pulling at his curls, pacing around the tight hallway. "I knew this was going to happen. I knew it."

"You knew what?"

Michael stopped walking and squared his shoulders up to face Alex. "I knew you were going to get rid of the inn and sell it to the highest bidder without even thinking about the consequences. Wyatt has wanted this inn for years, and when he couldn't get it, he tried everything in his power to make sure Hank failed. He used all his connections to keep people from coming to stay here and spread a lot of nasty rumors. It didn't work because Hank was a hell of a lot smarter than a Long will ever be, but him sitting in that office in a chair that Hank sat in…"

"I didn't know, Michael."

"Yeah, I know. Because you haven't once asked for my input or anyone else's here. It's always been about getting the hell out of Roswell as soon as possible and back to the big city. Oh, and your boyfriend. Can't forget about him now, can we."

Alex took a step toward Michael, and he stepped backward, effectively cooling Alex's anger and replacing it with sadness. "Michael-"

"Spare me, Alex," Michael said, cutting him off. "This is actually perfect. I went against all my instincts, and I thought, what the fuck, ya know? Maybe for once in my life, I could have that thing everyone wishes for. That great big, stupid love. I got my hopes up, and look where it got me."

Alex shook his head as if the action would somehow make Michael's words make sense to him. "Can we talk about this? Not just about the Starlight, but us?"

"There's nothing to talk about! You own the inn, right? It's your call what you do with it, and I guess the rest of us will just have to live with your decision. Nevermind, Wyatt Long is a racist prick who Hank never let set foot on the property. But go ahead, sell the inn to him. I'll land on my feet somehow, and I'll make damn sure everyone here does, too. Just finish your sale, and then you can get out of Roswell and out of my life for good."

The warring emotions floating through Alex's body were in constant battle, with sadness and quiet rage battling for the top spot. Michael was speaking as if Alex were a stranger, not the man who hours before had been wrapped in his arms and on the precipice of giving over his heart completely.

Michael was speaking at him, and it was belittling and harsh. Even though Alex had just officially ended things with his live-in boyfriend that day, this conversation was somehow the one that effectively broke his heart in half.

"Okay, Michael." Alex's voice was broken, and if the tiny flinch of Michael's eyes was any indication, he heard it too.

If Michael wanted to say more, Alex didn't let him. He turned and walked back into the office, slamming the door and not bothering to glance back at Michael. 

***

Alex walked into the Wild Pony late that night, having stopped by his hotel after the meeting with Martin and Wyatt to take a much-needed rest.

He only slept about forty minutes, mostly flailing about in his bed, wondering how the hell he'd been feeling so high that morning and suddenly so very low. Alex tried to remind himself that he'd been through the worst in his life, and this too would pass, but it didn't work. Sure, in many ways, he had been to hell and back during both his childhood and his time in the military, but he'd never known the pain of real heartbreak.

This was both physical and emotional pain crippling him slowly, and it made him want to scream.

He booked his flight home for the following morning, and it was an absorbent amount of money, but it didn't matter. Alex couldn't stay any longer than was necessary in Roswell right now.

He only went to the Pony to grab a few drinks so he could hopefully pass out that night. And he knew Michael wouldn't be there because he'd told him the night before that he had a thing with his siblings that evening.

Maria was behind the bar, her extravagant get-up from earlier gone and replaced with jeans and a black sweater. She had the same look on her face that she always had when she saw him, but there was a sorrow in her eyes that was new.

"Hi, Maria."

Maria placed a napkin down in front of him. "Hey. What can I get you?"

"I'll take a Heineken."

Maria walked off to grab the beer, and she set it down in front of him before walking to the other end of the bar to do something. Maria seemed to sense his sour attitude, plus in this small town, there was zero way word hadn't gotten back to her about what happened earlier at the Starlight.

Alex drank his first beer in just under three minutes, and his hand shot up to request another right away. 

"Another one?" Maria asked, depositing his beer in a receptacle behind the bar.

"Please," Alex started.

Maria came back a minute later with his beer, but she didn't run off this time. "I know this may be weird because we just met, and Michael and I have a history, but do you want to talk about it?"

Alex had been relatively sure that he would be left in peace at the bar, knowing Maria surely wouldn't insert herself into her ex-boyfriend's drama. But as soon as the offer was made to talk to SOMEONE about the mess that was currently his life, he started talking before he could stop himself.

There was something about this damn town that made Alex talk more than he had in years. Or maybe ever.

"I own the Starlight. My ex-boyfriend flew here from New York City on a whim to, I don't know, try and win me back or something. Then I met this awful man who was trying to buy the inn, and I almost physically fought him." Alex gasped after speaking without taking a break. "And Michael hates me."

Maria, to her credit, didn't do anything but listen. Her face stayed neutral and as kind as ever.

Alex didn't know what he was expecting her to say or do, but when he felt her small hand cover his jittery one top of the bar, he felt incredibly grateful.

"Michael doesn't hate you. I'd venture to say the exact opposite, actually."

"You didn't see his face. You didn't hear his voice. He was so cold to me. I didn't know anything about Wyatt, and that's my fault for just blindly trusting some realtor I knew nothing about also. I've been preoccupied since I got here. God, Michael was right. I should have done the research, and I should have put more thought into, well, everything."

"He saw you and your ex." Maria blurted out.

Alex stopped mid-sip of beer, his eyes going wide. "He what?"

Maria looked a little pained like there was an internal struggle in her brain about how much she should reveal. Alex's depressing state must have decided for her.

"I shouldn't even be telling you this, but I know he likes you a lot, and I think you like him, too."

"I do, Maria. A lot."

Maria gave him a reassuring smile. "He saw you kissing your ex, and he called his brother, Max, who's dating Liz, and she called Michael and tried to tell him that it was probably not what it looked like. But Michael is stubborn, and he didn't want to hear it."

"He kissed me! And it was a goodbye kiss, Maria. It was nothing more than that. I didn't even know he was going to just show up in New Mexico!"

"Alex, I believe you. But I'm not the one who you have to tell this to."

Alex reached for his wallet and threw a twenty down on the bar. He started to get off the stool but was stopped by Maria grabbing his arm.

"I don't know you, Alex, but I like you, and I care about Michael a lot. Be good to each other."

Alex smiled back kindly before rushing out of the bar and making a beeline to the local junkyard.

***

Alex knocked on the door of the airstream for several minutes before he gave up.

Michael's truck was nowhere to be seen, but Alex clung to the hope that maybe he'd left his truck elsewhere for the evening, but that wasn't the case.

He didn't know what else to do at the moment, so he tried calling him, but Michael's phone went straight to voicemail. For a while, Alex sat in his car, crafting a text to send, often deleting and re-wording things until he was ready to press send.

**_Alex (12:45 am): I'm at your place, but you're not here, and I don't know if that's for the best or not. I know you're mad, and I'm mad, too. But I want to talk to you. I want to see you. I want to touch you. In such a short amount of time, I've come to need you. So much. But all I want right now is for you to answer so I can explain everything. Explain about Chuck and explain about the Starlight. I'm due to leave tomorrow morning, but I don't want to do that without talking to you first. I'm going to go back to my hotel now, but call me…text me…stop by the hotel. Whatever you like. I'll be leaving at seven._ **

**_Alex (12:47 am): I think I love you, Michael._ **

Once the messages were sent, he shoved his phone into his pocket before turning the key in the ignition and preparing to start the journey back to his hotel.

He kept hoping to feel that familiar vibration of an incoming message in his coat, but it never came during the drive. And it didn't come when the phone was propped up on the nightstand next to Alex's bed. Nor did it come the following morning as Alex had the phone braced on his knee as he drove to the airport.

As he sat on the plane tuning out the flight attendant's instructions for proper safety, he finally powered down his phone, checking one last time to make sure he hadn't missed a text or a call.

He didn't want to cry in the middle of a crowded plane, but he couldn't bring himself to care about what the young woman with the obnoxious floral-scented perfume seated to his left thought when he took his face in his hands and sobbed earnestly as the plane took flight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE BOYS ARE FIGHTING!
> 
> Every Hallmark movie needs a misunderstanding and a dramatic scene, but all that means is we're that much closer to the sweet payoff! What's Alex going to do with the inn? Why didn't Michael respond to the messages? WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN? 
> 
> So much love for all you guys who've stuck with this. We're almost there!


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christmas in New York City.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All the fluff the boys (and you guys) deserve.

Alex's first few days back in New York were hard.

Alex didn't miss Chuck in the traditional sense, but it was odd to be in his home without the other man because it was something he had so rarely experienced. It was quieter, which wasn't a bad thing, but it gave Alex way too much time in his head.

And his head was always filled with thoughts of Michael. 

After he cried the first hour of the flight, Alex had gotten himself together, with the help of his seatmate Laurel who had horrible taste in perfume but was a goddamn peach who helped distract him for nearly four hours.

By the time he got off the plane, he'd reach the point where he couldn't handle knowing if Michael had responded or not, so he blocked his number and deleted his inbox before opening his messages. Maybe it wasn't the most mature approach, but he was so emotionally drained, he didn't think his mind, body, or spirit could handle anything else that day.

And he had meant for it to be a day, but one day turned to two, which turned to five, and now he was over a week removed from Roswell, and he'd still refused to unblock him. It was only a matter of time before he would have to do it for many reasons, but he wasn't ready yet.

The day Chuck came back to town to move out of the apartment, Alex made himself scarce, spending the majority of the day holed up in his office catching up on work and going over paperwork he'd taken from the inn.

He'd hoped to be able to tell Michael in person that last night in Roswell about his decision not the sell the Starlight, but clearly, things hadn't gone the way he hoped. He had no idea how he would do it all because he still wasn't moving to Roswell, at least not in the near future. But, he'd made a decision when he sat alone in his grandfather's office after Wyatt and Martin were escorted out that the Starlight was going to stay in the hands of a Manes man. Specifically, his.

In the end, that decision hadn't been very hard, and it felt right. The logistics were still a bit of a nightmare, but the employees could run the show without an owner breathing down their necks twenty-four seven. And there was Michael. Capable, reliable, smart as all hell Michael.

He could efficiently run the property, and Alex could be the owner in name only, popping in now and then and keeping up with the bills.

Alex made a goal of making that phone call to Michael after Christmas. He didn't want to ruin Michael's holiday.

Chuck knocked lightly on the door around ten when he and his friends had finished moving out the last of his things, and Alex bid him farewell with a slight wave. He had a feeling that would be the last time he ever saw the man, and it was a strange feeling for sure, but one he was content with.

He always thought about Michael the most at night. He thought about how much their whirlwind romance had changed him in such a short amount of time. He'd always heard love was a blessing, but when you don't have much love in your life, it's hard to believe that.

Meeting Michael and loving Michael made Alex feel whole. If only for a little while. And for that, he would be eternally grateful.

After a few minutes of reflection, he passed out, dreaming of a specific set of bouncing curls and a crooked smile.

***

Alex's phone started ringing early on Christmas Eve.

He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes as best he could, pulling his phone off the nightstand to see "BILL" in bold letters on the screen. Bill was the doorman of his building, and he only ever called if there was a package for him he didn't want to store in the mailroom, or there was a guest for Alex that wasn't on his approved list for entry to the elevators.

"Hey, Billy."

"Alex. I have a man down here who is insisting he be let up, and I've tried to explain to him several times that you have to be on the list and have the elevator code, but he's not taking no for an answer." Bill was whispering, and he sounded exasperated.

"Anyone who would come here for me would have my number," Alex huffed out.

"That's the thing, sir. He does have your number, but he says it's not working."

"I'm lost, Billy."

It was then Alex heard his voice in the background, asking Bill if he could speak to Alex. It was Michael. He was in the lobby of his building arguing with his doorman. And Alex almost fell out of his bed at the sound of his voice.

"Let him up! Let him up!"

"Are you sure, sir?"

"Yes, yes! Michael Guerin. Add him to the list and give him the code. Now!"

"Yes, sir."

Alex didn't bother to even hang up, quickly pulling his prosthesis from where it was sat next to his bed and putting it on with a quickness. He grabbed the t-shirt and sweats he'd discarded before he went to sleep and put them back on before rushing into the bathroom to brush his teeth quickly.

He had about thirty seconds before Michael would be at his door, and he was going to utilize every single one of them.

When the quiet tap came, Alex gave himself a glance over in the foyer's mirror and took a deep breath before opening the door.

In all his cowboy glory, Michael was standing before him, a black Stetson on his head, cuffed blue jeans, and a tan corduroy jacket. He was a thing of beauty.

"You wear that thing on the plane?" Alex said, motioning to the hat.

"Nah," Michael replied, shifting in place. "I did wear in it the car, though."

"You drove here?"

Michael nodded.

"You drove from New Mexico to New York City?"

"I'm here, aren't I?"

Alex knew he must have looked deranged with how he was staring back at Michael with his mouth agape and his eyes blown wide. "Michael…"

"I couldn't get through to you, and I had to see you, so…can I come in?" Michael was an anxious mess, feet shuffling and hands waving around.

Alex stepped aside and made room for Michael to walk inside. He guided him into the main sitting area, which was just a large room with a tan sectional, matching twin chairs, a coffee table, and a mounted flat screen. Gone were the books that cluttered the table and the plants spread out amongst the room now that Chuck was no longer a resident.

Michael seemed to be waiting on Alex to make a move, so he sat down in one of the chairs closest to the floor to ceiling windows that gave way to the terrace, and Michael sat in the one on the opposite side of the room.

"How was the drive?" Alex asked after an extended silence.

"It was awful, honestly."

"Oh. Sorry to hear that."

Michael barked out a laugh. "Don't be."

They fell into silence again, and with each passing minute, Alex felt like he was closer and closer to screaming.

_Why are you here? What didn't you call me back that night? Why are you here? Are you in love with me even half as much as I'm in love with you?_

"You're probably wondering why I drove here." Michael's voice was shaky, and a little higher than Alex was used to.

"Just a little."

"I didn't see your message that night, Alex. I swear on everything. I went to Isobel's, and I had too much too drink. I passed out, then couldn't reach you the next morning. And haven't been able to since. I was so upset that day, just a mess." Michael stopped talking to take a deep breath. "I saw you in front of the sidewalk kissing someone. There's not a lot of out guys in Roswell, and I know every single one. I just assumed it was your ex, and then Liz confirmed it. And I just lost it. I lost it."

Alex scooted up on his seat, aching to touch Michael but keeping his body rooted to the chair. "That was Chuck, but it wasn't what it looked like. He came to Roswell to, I guess, try to talk and get back together, but I told him it was over. And he kissed me, but it was a goodbye kiss. Michael that is over. He moved out a few days ago."

Michael was listening intently, the nervous energy still surrounding him, but his eyes transfixed on Alex. "Okay. I believe you. I do. It's just I saw that, and then I see you meeting with Wyatt Long of all people…"

"I know. I shouldn't have taken that meeting without bothering to even look the guy up. Or talking to you and Carla. I just wasn't thinking-"

"Alex!" Michael cut him off and abruptly stood up from his chair. "I didn't come here so you could explain yourself to me. I didn't even bother to try and talk to you. I just shut down. I was a jerk. I was a complete and utter jerk to you, and I am so sorry. I don't want to make excuses, but I'm a work in progress, okay. When I saw you with him, with Chuck, I just felt like I was drowning or something. I've never felt like that before. I was like out of control or something. Then I got to the Starlight, and I saw Wyatt, and I just snapped. You deserve better than that version of me."

Alex couldn't tear his eyes away from Michael as he spoke rapidly, hands flying around animatedly. He wanted to talk but willed himself to be patient and let Michael finish. He'd earned that much.

"I want to be better for myself. I have to be better for myself. I can't keep pushing away people who care about me. It's not a long list or anything, but there is a list, and you're at the top of it. I want to put work in and be someone that you can be proud of."

"Michael, you should be so proud of who you are. Mistakes are a part of life. I've made plenty, and I will definitely make more." Alex left his chair and walked over to Michael, standing close enough to touch him but keeping his hands to himself.

"You can not be this understanding and gracious. I know you were pissed at me. You blocked my number!"

Alex rubbed at his eyes and chuckled lightly. "I did. And I was pissed. I still am, I guess. It's just hard to be mad when you're standing right here, and I can tell how sorry you are."

It was Michael's turn to laugh, a little redness coloring his cheeks. "You have a right to be pissed. I just need you to know that I am sorry. And I want this. I want you."

Alex took a small step forward, still keeping his hands at his side. "I know you don't want to hear my apology, but I am sorry too, Michael. I'm sorry you had to see what you saw. I know if the roles were reversed, I would be pretty devastated."

"Devasted, huh?"

"Well, yeah." Alex paused to collect himself, sneaking a peek at Michael's lower lip as he nibbled on it incessantly. "This must seem insane from the outside."

"I know someone who met his wife on a Monday, and they got engaged the following weekend."

"Oh my god, really?"

Michael shook his head. "No, not really. But would that be so crazy?"

Alex laughed. "Kind of, yeah. I'm sure your siblings think you're crazy."

Michael's eyes dropped to Alex's lip for a millisecond, sending a chill down Alex's spine. "Iz thinks I'm dickmatized. And Max thinks it's cute. He told me a once in a lifetime love is worth everything. He even let me borrow his Jeep."

Alex froze at the word love, eyes wandering Michael's face before he slowly reached his hand out to tug on the sleeve of Michael's jacket. Michael followed the action and moved in, bringing him and Alex chest to chest, breathes ghosting each other's faces.

Alex leaned in to place a lingering kiss on Michael's cheek before whispering, "You read my text?"

Michael copied Alex's movements and lightly pressed a kiss to Alex's cheek. "Only fifty times."

Alex held his breath. "And?"

"You think?"

"I know, Michael." Alex didn't hesitate. "I'm in love with you."

Michael's arms surrounded Alex in a swift motion that had Alex grasping at Michael's jacket and pulling himself into the crook of Michael's neck. "I'm in love with you, Alex. I know that this is real. I've never been surer of anything."

Alex kissed Michael's neck fervently, delighting in the tiny whines that escaped Michael's mouth. But just as Alex made his way to Michael's lips, the man jerked away.

"Can we talk more?" Michael was gasping a bit. "I want this. I want this so fucking bad. But I just drove a long way, and I did a lot of thinking, and there is still so much I want to say to you. I want to do this right. I can't lose this again."

"Hey," Alex breathed out, kissing Michael's forehead. "You never lost me. And you won't. How about you get a shower, and then we just relax. We can talk all day and all night. Whatever you want."

"Okay, but can I just say I love you again? Because I really do."

Alex grinned back shyly before grasping Michael's hand and pulling him down the hallway to the bathroom, eyes never leaving one another's.

***

Christmas Eve dinner was frozen pizza and bourbon.

They ate on the kitchen floor, backs up against the large island, thighs and arms always touching.

"He took your fish?"

Alex laughed around a bite of meat lovers pie. "He did. But to be fair, it ended up being more his fish than mine. I'm going to miss Lucky, though."

"Where'd the name Lucky come from?"

"I had a meeting over in Jersey, and it started downpouring when I was outside waiting for my Uber, so I hid out in this little pet store. The guy that worked there was relentless, and I just needed him to stop talking, so I told him I would take a goldfish. Of course, he did not stop talking, and before I picked out the one I wanted, he asked me who was going to be the lucky fish. The name just stuck with me. Had him for almost two years." Alex recalled the story a little wistfully, and Michael hung on every word.

When he started to push up off the floor, Alex grabbed his arm. "Where are you going? We still have another pizza to eat."

"Get your coat. We're going to find you a fish. And this place needs a Christmas tree."

"Babe, it's six on Christmas Eve."

"Babe? That's new." Michael was leering like always and looking like a dream.

Alex's cheeks lit up, and embarrassment swept through him, but he couldn't keep the smile off his face. "It slipped. You hate it?

"I love it, _babe_. And I love you, but you need to get moving. Now!"

***

They made it to the pet store one minute after closing, and it took all of Michael's cowboy charm to convince the two girls working to let them in. They ended up giving them five minutes to get a fish and whatever else they would need.

There was a bunch of fish to choose from, and in the end, they picked a red goldish and a yellow and white one, a small tank, and a copious amount of fish food.

"What are we going to name them?" Alex asked as he and Michael left the store en route to their next stop.

Michael was holding the fish tank, and he held it up to his eyes so he could get a better look at the little fishies. "How about we name the red one Hank. That was his favorite color."

Alex looked over to Michael and thought his chest might burst at the intense feeling of love pounding away. "That's perfect. What about the other one?"

"Days Inn."

"Days Inn? Like the hotel chain?"

"Yeah. We stayed there in Albuquerque. And it's when I knew I was falling in love with you."

Alex stopped walking abruptly, and it took Michael a few steps to realize he'd lost his sidewalk buddy. He turned around and looked a little confused until the soft smile on Alex's face registered to him.

"What did I do to deserve you?"

Michael's lips curled up into a delicious smile. "I could ask you the same thing."

Alex walked over to Michael and planted a kiss on him that was too much for a crowded New York sidewalk. But it was hard to care about what anyone thought when he felt this good, and this loved.

***

They couldn't find a traditional Christmas tree anywhere, but they did find an overpriced faux potted fig tree at a Pottery Barn type store that came with a set of white string lights.

Once they got back to Alex's place, they set up the fish tank in Lucky's old spot in Alex's bedroom and decided to put the tree in the corner of the main living room where it was up against the terrace doors. It was only about five feet tall, not overly bright, and not a Christmas tree, but it was his and Michael's. And to him, it was flawless.

"I know you just got here, but when were you planning on going back?" Alex asked as they snuggled up on the couch, watching an old episode of The Office.

"I've never taken any time off since I started. I asked Randy to give me a week, but I spent two and a half on the road. And it will be another two home. So, I guess that gives me three days to see the big apple," Michael said as he nuzzled into Alex's shoulder, leaving little kisses on the soft fabric of his t-shirt.

"Well, I could extend your time off since I'm the boss now. Kept you here until the new year," Alex said as he breathed in Michael's curls.

"Yeah, I can't believe we haven't even talked about the Starlight yet." Michael leaned back and looked Alex in the eye. "The whole town knows what happened with you and Wyatt and that you're not selling the inn to him. And it hasn't hit the market yet. What are you going to do? Whatever you decide, I will support you in any way I can, Alex. And I'll help you if you want my help. Anything you need."

"I'm glad you said that because I'm not selling the inn. And I will need you to be my eyes and ears when I can't be out there."

Michael's face went through about ten different emotions in the span of a minute as he worked over what Alex had said. "Yes, yes. Of course."

"You don't seem happy," Alex muttered, stiffening up a bit and pulling back.

"I'm thrilled, Alex," Michael said as he yanked Alex back to him and nestled back into his shoulder. "You just always said you were going to sell the inn, and you weren't moving to Roswell. And I knew that even with us starting this, we'd have to figure out the long-distance, but I didn't think the Starlight was going to be a part of our relationship."

Alex kissed the top of Michael's head. "I know, but I realized pretty much five minutes after meeting Wyatt that I couldn't sell that place to him or anyone else. The Starlight is staying with me. It's staying with us. I don't have all the answers right now about how it's all going to work, but we'll figure it out together."

"Together," Michael echoed.

"Hey, it's a few minutes after twelve. Merry Christmas, Babe."

Michael reached for Alex's head, twirling his fingers in his hair and pulling him into a kiss. "Merry Christmas, Babe. I'm pretty sure nothing is ever going to top this Christmas."

Alex didn't say anything but wiggled his eyebrows a twinge.

"You're already thinking about how to top this next year, aren't you?" Michael cooed, with nothing but love and desire twinkling in his eyes.

"Yes. But in the meantime, we've got a year of new memories to make."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pretend in this version of 2021, Michael doesn't realize he could use someone else's phone to call or text Alex and potentially not have to drive 30 hours 🙃
> 
> I was going to end it here but I have something fun planned for the final chapter that I hope works out!
> 
> We're almost there! I hope this payoff was worth it!


	12. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A few of the days spent in New York from Michael's POV.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finishing this is so bittersweet! I was really not sure if this was even worth publishing, but I am so glad I decided to just put it out there and see what happens. You guys have all been so kind, and I can't thank you enough for all the support. Every single person who commented or left a kudo, I APPRECIATE YOU.

Michael wasn't expecting to still be in New York when the postcards started to come in.

His decision to come to New York was impulsive, and although he hadn't exactly thought it all the way through, he still made sure all his ducks were in a row before he just took off on a thirty-hour drive to the east coast. He made sure the inn was in good hands (it helped that they were only half full for the actual holiday week) and that his siblings were aware of where he would be.

He'd found Alex's address in a notebook Hank left behind in the safe he kept under his desk a few days after Alex left. As soon as he saw it, he knew that seeing him was the key to everything. He had to look him in the eye when he admitted that he was a mess in a lot of ways; hell, maybe they both were, but they were in love, and he refused to give up on them.

And it was love. Michael knew it. He felt it pulsing throughout his soul whenever his mind drifted to Alex, which was all the time.

He'd spent the many hours in the car either remembering all the times they'd spent together, wallowing in self-pity about the fact Alex had cut him off, or rehearsing what he would say to Alex when he saw him again.

The drive was arduous and uncomfortable, but it didn't matter when the potential reward was having Alex Manes a fixture in his everyday life. And he would make fifty cross-country trips to make that a reality.

When he got to Lubbock to stop for gas, he noticed a rack of postcards that looked like they were a decade old in the small market attached to the gas pumps. An idea sprang to mind at that moment, and he bought one then got back in the Jeep to scribble away.

He did that in every state he drove through, documenting some of his trip for Alex or just saying hello. Even if things went south in New York, Michael thought that perhaps the postcards would still be a nice thing for Alex to receive. All he ever wanted to do was make Alex smile again.

Texas and Oklahoma came together a few days before New Year's.

**GREETINGS FROM LUBBOCK**

**_Surprise! I'm on my way to see you in New York. First stop is Texas and it's cold. Max's Jeep is crap on gas but the drive is so pretty. I can't wait to see your face. Did you know Buddy Holly was born here? Love, Michael_ **

**SEE YOU IN OKLAHOMA CITY**

**_I've never been to Oklahoma before. It's really flat. And there's just miles and miles of nothing but it's not like New Mexico. I miss you. Crazy to think a few days has me so attached. I miss you. Love, Michael_ **

***

Missouri and Indiana showed up on New Year's Eve.

**GATEWAY ARCH, ST. LOUIS**

**_Got to drive by the gateway arch. Pretty cool in person. Maybe one day we can road trip together. See all the states have to offer. I'd go anywhere with you. Love, Michael_ **

**HELLO FROM INDIANAPOLIS**

**_Coming down the home stretch. There's so much I want to say when I see you. I know I messed up but I hope you'll see me. Love, Michael_ **

***

They celebrated New Year's Eve in Alex's apartment with Hank and Days Inn watching the ball drop on television like much of the rest of the country. They could hear the chaos out on the streets of the city, but they stayed perfectly wrapped up in each other's arms on the couch, sharing a quick kiss that turned passionate in a heartbeat.

***

Illinois showed up the day after New Year's, as Michael was preparing to get back on the road.

**I HEART EFFINGHAM**

**_I'm so sorry._ **

Michael watched Alex read the postcard as he was making a cup of coffee, and he almost dropped his mug when he saw Alex start to weep on the other side of the island openly.

"Alex, babe, what's wrong?" Michael said in a rush, setting his mug down and walking quickly to Alex's side. "Is that the one from Pennsylvania? I was delirious when I wrote that one."

Alex chuckled through his tears. "No. I just still can't believe you're here and that you drove here and that this is all real."

Michael rubbed small circles on Alex's lower back and left a lingering kiss on his temple. "This is so real."

"I don't want you to go," Alex croaked out, as his sobs subsided.

Michael walked back over to grab his coffee mug. He needed to be back on the road two hours ago, but he and Alex had been unable to get out of bed that morning, unable to stop touching, and somehow it was already after twelve, and Michael was still in his boxers.

He was putting a lot on Randy and the whole crew over the holidays, and the guilt was starting to creep in about not being at the Starlight where people depended on him. The days spent with Alex were everything he could have dreamed of, and while he knew that from now on part of his heart would be wherever Alex was, the rest of it was back in Roswell.

"I know. And I've loved being here but-"

"You have to go home to your people. I get it. It just sucks."

"Hey, you're my people, too. And it's three weeks. You will be back in Roswell in three weeks."

Alex nodded and smiled, but Michael noted that the sadness was still on his face as he walked back to the bedroom.

Michael grabbed his phone off the coffee table in the main room and dialed Randy's number.

"What's up, Mike?" Randy sounded far away, like he was on speakerphone.

"Just checking in to see how things are going."

"Bro, you've called every damn day since you left. Everything is good. And even if it all went to hell, we would figure it out, okay?"

Michael shrugged and rubbed at the tension in his shoulder. "Alright, alright."

"You'll be back in a few days, right?"

"Yeah, supposed to get on the road today, but I'm running late."

"Listen, just leave tomorrow, then you'll be back in time for the weekend. Everything is fine here. The girls miss you, but we are holding everything down."

Michael grinned, thinking about the ladies who were no doubt waiting with bated breath for him to return, as he was a lot more easygoing than Randy. "I bet they are. Okay, I'll be on the road first thing tomorrow. And I'll call you then."

"Aye, aye. Enjoy your night!"

Michael skipped to the bedroom like a toddler on the way to the swing set and stopped in the doorway when he saw Alex folding up Michael's clothes, which he'd left sprawled around the room since he got there.

"You don't have to pick up after me. I'm sorry, I'll get my stuff," Michael explained, crossing the threshold and taking his hoodie out of Alex's hands.

"I don't mind helping you pack, Michael. But maybe I can keep the hoodie? It smells like you," Alex said shyly.

"And what do I smell like?"

Alex made a dramatic show of wrinkling his nose in the air and taking a big whiff. "A fresh rainstorm. It's magical, honestly."

"I smell magical, huh?" Michael asked before plopping down on the bed and pulling Alex into his open legs. Alex moved in close and ran his fingers through Michael's curls, a move that always elicited a soft purr from deep in Michael's throat.

"God, the things I wish we could do right now," Alex began with a hunger in his eyes that Michael had quickly learned meant Michael was going to be sore in all the right places later. "But you're already running behind schedule. Though we could also book you a flight and ship Max's Jeep, so you don't have to make that awful drive back."

Michael rolled his eyes playfully because, on top of Alex's pleas for him to stay longer, he'd also mentioned more than once that he would pay whatever expense so Michael could get back to New Mexico faster and more efficiently.

It meant everything to Michael that Alex would offer, but he wasn't in the market to accept charity like that. Maybe one day he would get there, but he wasn't there yet.

"Well, good news, babe. You get me for another twenty-four hours. Randy said I could leave tomorrow."

The desire in Alex's eyes morphed into a softness that traveled down to his mouth, which curled up into an alluring smile. Michael would never get sick of being on the receiving end of that look.

"Well then, looks like I've got some time to do some exploring."

***

They fell asleep a little earlier than usual because Michael did have to get on the road at a reasonable time the following morning.

Michael watched Alex sleep for a long time, taking in the way his chest rose and fell and how his left eyebrow was just a tad bit bushier than his right. He would make it his life's mission to learn every single thing there was to know about Alex's mind, body, and soul.

The thought immediately gave him pause, though, as he thought about the fact that the deeper this went, and it was most definitely going to get deeper, meant Michael had to expose certain parts of himself that no one knew. Not Maria, whom he'd half-opened his heart to a lifetime ago, or any of the countless men and women he'd forged sexual relationships with.

Only his siblings, who shared the same secret, knew what he was. And the secret they'd held onto for some twenty plus years was about to be unleashed because he needed Alex to see every piece of Michael Guerin.

That night wasn't the time for it, but the time was coming soon. A thought that left Michael both nervous and elated as he rested his head on Alex's chest and fell asleep to Alex's breathy snores. 

***

Alex insisted on getting the mail the next morning before Michael set off on his journey back west to see if the rest of the postcards came in.

And by some miracle, there was Ohio, Pennsylvania, and New Jersey.

**THE BUCKEYE STATE**

**_I'm starting to see signs for New York, which means I'm getting close. This is probably the craziest thing I've ever done in my life, but love is crazy, right? Missing you still. I'll see you soon. Love, Michael_ **

**HARRISBURG PA 1950s**

**_I drove through the night and that was probably a mistake. But I just need to see you as quick as I can. I am sorry. So sorry. I know we can make this work if you'll just talk to me. Please, please talk to me. A few more states than you. Loving you, Michael._ **

**GREETINGS FROM NEW JERSEY, THE GARDEN STATE**

**_Almost there! Jersey is my favorite state so far because it means I'm almost done this drive! I hope these postcards have been okay and you're not burning them when they come in because I've ruined everything again. Please know I'm always thinking of you. Love, Michael_ **

"Why are you the sweetest person I've ever met?" Alex asked as they stood in the parking garage, arms tight around each other's waists.

Michael let go first because he started to become genuinely concerned that he wouldn't be able to break away if he didn't do it right that second. "I'm just in love. Sue me."

Alex kissed him gently on the forehead, followed by his right cheek, then his left, then his chin, and finally his lips. "Three weeks. I love you."

"I love you, too. Three weeks," Michael whispered back.

With one final loving and longing look, Michael got into the Jeep and got things in order for his ride home. Alex had insisted on packing him copious amounts of drinks and food so he wouldn't have to stop for fast food as he had on the ride there. And Michael took a few minutes to arrange things for himself in the front seat before setting his phone up on the dashboard and plugging in the coordinates for Roswell, New Mexico.

He looked in the rearview mirror before starting the car and saw Alex had left like he said he was, afraid he might fling himself in front of the Jeep if he lingered too long in the garage.

Michael snickered to himself as he started the car and pulled down the visor. A thick piece of paper fell onto his lap, and he realized quickly that it was a postcard. He swore his heart flip-flopped around in his chest as he took the words in.

**WELCOME TO THE BIG APPLE**

**_You're gone, and I wish I could say I'm doing fine, but I'm probably just staring at the fish and wishing you were here. Spending this time with you has been the happiest I've been in all my life. We're going to keep working on being the best versions of ourselves for each other and I'm so excited for our future. I love you with all my heart, Alex._ **

Michael reached for his phone to call Alex, but then stopped himself and decided he'd give him some time before he called. They hadn't been without each other in days, and they would have to get used to the separation one way or another.

As he pulled out into the busy New York City streets, he flipped on the radio and fiddled around until an old Frank and Nancy Sinatra duet filled the car up. Sappy love songs weren't typically his thing, but neither were boyfriends and feelings of all-consuming longing and devotion.

He let the 'I love you's' fill the truck and even started to sing along as he made the long trek home. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had no idea how to write a postcard into a fic, but I tried! Are postcards even a thing anymore? 🥴
> 
> I really love this world. And if there's interest, I was thinking about continuing the story from Michael's perspective and seeing how they navigate working together, Michael's secret, and a long distance relationship. Haven't broken ground on it, but I do have some ideas. 
> 
> The song at the end is Something Stupid, and it's where the title of the fic comes from. It's such a Malex song to me. 
> 
> Again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for all the support!

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Kudos and comments are always appreciated but never expected. Just thanks for taking the time to stop by 😊


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